Total of 28 user reviews spread across 28 releases
Assassin's Creed III
I'd like to review the game, but I've been fighting off respawning soldiers for 12 straight hours.
I'm not using a pirated version or anything. I paid for the game so it's up-to-date in patches, and yet this game that's been out for a year is still not fixed. If you start a fight in certain loca...
Game Dev Tycoon
Confusion and guesswork lost in a land of happy bubbles.
Here's why people play this game. 1. To see a bunch of dots float towards the sky 2. To see random numbers appear after their game This game doesn't bother to explain much of the reason behind...
I feel like I'm taking crazy pills here! This is like a blank book sold for 20 bucks where you write your own story.
I feel like I'm in Body Snatchers and I'm the only one left that they haven't turned yet. Just by writing this review, I'm expecting you all to point at me and screech in the form of name-calling and...
XCOM: Enemy Unknown
Addictive gameplay and mysterious draw outshine what is actually a pretty average game
If you just look at this game piece by piece, it's actually pretty terrible. It's got the graphics that could be found on a PS2. It's got generic character designs, a generic plot, a terrible ending...
Starcraft II: Heart of the Swarm
This game just isn't that good (Campaign)
*Probably Spoilers* HotS took so long to come out that most of us pictured hundreds if not thousands of developers working diligently to perfect the much anticipated game so as to if not exceed WoL...
Far Cry 3
Far Cry 3 loses some good features from Far Cry 2, but gains an equal amount back, earning it the same score. 9.0
Far Cry 3 improved on a lot of things wrong with Far Cry 2, but at the same time it lost a lot of the things that made Far Cry great. It all evens out, though. Instead of a coherent review, allow me...
Can we stop pretending this is a good game? This is the same game as before.
NBA 2K13 is the exact same game as it has been for years. The controls are still ridiculously clunky. Simply holding left, trying to get from Point A to Point B which is about 3 feet away will gener...
Max Payne 3
Like Max himself, the game is a drunken, aging, slightly dulled reminder of a classic.
Bullet time gunfights are still so fun, you could almost release a mini-game version with no plot and this game would still get an 8.0. And that's almost what this game did. But let's break it down ...
Great concept, great game, but frustrating as all hell sometimes. (Invincible picket fence review)
I'll just jump right into the good/bad list with any witty intro. GOOD -The graphics and facial overlay technology is so realistic, you can usually recognize the real life actor who played the r...
Dragon Age II
Come on in and read this honest review. Free punch and pie.
Alright now that I've drawn you in with promises of pastry, let's get down to it. First, you will notice that it has become "cool" to bash this game. From the massive amounts of thumbs down on a...
A "shoot em up" type game, except unlike the movie Shoot em Up, this one is actually good.
This game is basically Gears of War mixed with Duke Nukem. However, while most hybrid games half-ass both sides to make an average whole, Bulletstorm does exceptionally well on both sides of the spec...
Fight Night Champion
You better enjoy flash knockdowns, cause you're about to experience 173 of them.
*Spoilers... I guess* This is the official "I'm not a Fight Night fanboy so I can review games correctly" review. *******The Good******* -the graphics are a slight improvement -th...
Fight Night Round 3
Not really any better than Round 2, the features and glory of Xbox360 are shaved off and we're left with shaving scum.
You can't really judge Round 3 for PS2 because it wasn't made for PS2, it was made for XBox360 and PS2 couldn't keep up. All the new facial features and realistic punch effects are AWAL in the PS2 ve...
Call of Duty: Black Ops
All the other reviewers are smoking drugs. This game borders on perfection.
I keep reading about how CoD isn't known for its plot lines so the "mediocre" campaign mode is acceptable. I'd like to know what uber futuristic games they've been playing that dwarfs this game. MW2...
UFC Undisputed 2010
Hey I might actually win this o... whoops my arm's broken. Activate rage quit.
So here's a breakdown of every fight in career mode. Hey I've been wailing on this guy for 2 rounds. I'm bored, guess I'll take him down for a bit. Well that was easy, let me just change posi... an...
Fallout: New Vegas
New Vegas is fun because Fallout 3 was fun... and New Vegas is just an addon sold for 50 bucks. A buggy, yet fun addon.
15 minutes into New Vegas, I was wondering if I had just paid 50 bucks for an addon. New Vegas was supposed to be the next Fallout game in the series, with a completely new setup, characters, and env...
Major League Baseball 2K10
Prepare to watch a groundout on replay. Pitching is only thing enjoyable.
First off, the numpad controls are completely reversed... so pressing up throws home and left throws to first. Secondly, there are sporadic AI choices... like the outfielder throwing to the "cutoff m...
Battlefield: Bad Company 2
The "Campaign mode totally blows" review
After getting booted from yet another "failed to migrate host" lagfest of MW2 involving hackers, knifers, and toob spammers, I decided I needed a new game. So I went out and bought the highest rated,...
NCAA Football 09
EA has been on autopilot for years. Silly silly and only getting sillier.
Let's call Madden '94 the first real football game, since it was first to utilize the features we have expanded on and improved over the years. So, we're 15 years worth of football games in and nob...
Fight Night Round 4
Should be called Fight Night: Counter-Strike... or Counter Fight... or Don't Bother Throwing Regular Punches: Round 4
Aesthetically, FN4 has made major improvements. The fighters look as realistic as the ever have and don't the same cartoony feel as before. The knockdowns are almost there. They've done away wi...
Guitar Hero World Tour
Just like a real band; getting softer and more pop filled over the years.
(Insert generic Guitar Hero praise review here) Alright, now that we've covered how GH is awesome for the 4th, 5th, 6th (depending on which games in the series you consider good) time, let's move...
Madden NFL 08
Hey look! It's Madden '01 seven years later!
So when I first started playing the game, I thought "Hey, new tackle animations, a new kicking system, this is gonna be an improvement! Finally!" 2 hours later, I'm swearing and being a 3r...
Myth II: Soulblighter
Built the pyramids, pa-shaw, kid's stuff. Myth II is the 8th wonder of the world, but number 1 in our hearts.
And yay, on the 3rd day Bungie created Myth II. And yay, the Lord saw that it was good. So he played it for 8 straight hours every day after school for 18 consecutive months, formed an online order,...
Sid Meier's Pirates!
Avast! I'm peed myself! Ahoy, I can't stop playing, call for help.
Right, I couldn't stop playing the crappy looking original Pirates back when I was like 13, and I didn't even really know how to swordfight, attack attack attack. And now, God Bless America, they've ...
Playboy: The Mansion
Marketed as a Sims knockoff... delivered as a Sims knockoff... no surprise here, still fun
PB is just about as fun as the Sims, just like it looked on the back of the box. The pervs will be let down; "sex" scenes are dry humping infinitely on couches and pixelated boobs grow old quickly. ...
Excellent tycoon, movie making is too much piecing of animations
I've been waiting for The Movies to come out since I saw a 3 sentence mention in a Gamepro of like 2001. I finally got it... then waited a month for the patch... then played for 3 days. The tycoon p...
Madden NFL 2005
As close to perfect as we've come, but still a ways to go
It's like heaven, if in heaven someone took a dump in your shoes daily. Visually, Madden is amazing and outdoes every other football game available. Sound-wise... awesome hit effects and Al Michaels...