Minecraft is a Breath of Fresh Chest Hair

User Rating: 7 | Minecraft (Classic) PC
By Rotondi | Review Date:
For those of you under the age of twenty-two, you'll be surprised at which of your old buddies you're still friends with as time goes on. Most of them will be gone like the wind by the time your twenty-four, beginning the next chapter in your existence. This ain't a bad thing. Just how things work.

Being stranded in the middle of nowhere deserves an explanation. But we write it off most of the time because the darker side of our emotions have always desired to be in a similar type of situation. Alone in an unknown place forced to explore until some day conquering the land and calling it our own. In Minecraft you can make gigantic phallic objects out of gold, build the tallest skyscraper or even make a model of yourself to beat off to when the sun goes down.

To use the analogy of mowing the lawn again (since I'm drunk and can't think of another), in Minecraft you can always look back and see the area of grass you've just mowed, along with the blood stains from your neighbors dog. Except this guy's lawn has an endless amount of acres. I hope the owner is paying you big bucks because you ain't finishing for a long time...

Sometimes when you hold taking a dump in, the sensation is spectacular.

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