Are You Kidding Me?!? Activision, here I come!

User Rating: 2 | Medal of Honor: Vanguard PS2
When I was growing up, I would come home from school and the first thing I would do was go to the pantry and look for a snack. Oreos were my favorite. In fact, I liked them so much I would eat a couple on my way to the fridge. Occasionally, the worst thing that could possibly happen to an Oreo filled mouth did indeed happen. Open fridge. Lift milk jug. Simultaneous disappointment and seething anger. My brother, you see, enjoyed finishing the milk and replacing the empty, worthless, and, fraudulent vessel in the hopes of tricking me. Pretty dirty trick.

EA is now my brother. By putting an empty, worthless and, fraudulent game on the market, they have made themselves equal to those who would deny an Oreo eater the other half of the equation.

Before I list the bad, here are the good. The graphics and sound were both decent.

Now, on to the negatives. In the first "campaign" the recycled music was the first thing to get on my nerves. Then, my hopes were raised when one of my "squadmates" said of the Italians we were fighting, "You think these guys are hard, wait till you see the Germans!". Part of me is still waiting on that Italian street, waiting for the challenge to come. Instead, I got "squadmates" who pushed me out of my hiding places, couldn't shoot an enemy three feet away, and whose deployment features were mysteriously absent.

On the other hand, it was a good thing my "squadmates" were worthless, or else the lack of a challenge would have been absolute instead of merely deformed, depraved, and, unrecognizable.

Playing this game felt like work.

The weapons were ho-hum. The new life meter left me feeling dead inside.
The best thing I can say about this game is that the unoriginal and boring game play was mercifully ended by the pathetically short campaigns.

I believe the Saving Private Ryan wave that EA rode to get the franchise into my living room and onto my tv broke a long time ago. I was simply too loyal (stupid) to see it.

In conclusion, this game was a complete hack job. Its only purpose was to wring a few dollars out of us PS2 hold outs before we upgrade.

If I ever play a Medal Of Honor game again, I will be renting it.

I am home from school again, the milk is full and a smile crawls across my face. My smile quickly reverses because the oreos have all been licked clean and carefully replaced, devoid of any substance or quality. Thanks a lot bro (EA.)