Greatest game of our time!?

User Rating: 1.5 | Jumper: Griffin's Story X360
By AFS-Marc | Review Date:
Where do I begin? I guess I can start off by firmly saying that this is the worst X360 game I have ever played. I'll get some quick points out of the way first. There's not much to the audio in this game. There's simple music, lackluster sound effects and Jamie Bell does lend his voice for the game, though he wasn't given much to do. So what I'm basically saying is that the audio is the best part of the game. Can you see where this review is heading already? The controls are junk and camera is terrible. I will say that the only real decent part of this game is the fighting system. Each face button corresponds to a different direction, but they never really make any use of it besides the basic attacks.

So why don't we talk about the graphics now, I mean this is the HD-era so I bet you think this game is a real looker. I'm sorry to disappoint, but it looks absolutely pathetic graphically and wouldn't even be able to cut it on the last-gen systems. All the enemies are basically the same with either a darker skin tone or a vagina and the world is extremely bland, but that's not the worst part. There is draw-in inside rooms and in some cases the floor doesn't even load. There really is nothing better than beating down on some generic dude while you're both walking on air. That last statement was sarcastic if you couldn't tell. Besides being a graphical piece of fecal matter, there's still more!

This game is short, really short. I don't think I've played a single-player game this short since the days of the NES. I've heard people say 2-3 hours is what it would take to beat the game. I was able to go through it in just over an hour. That's not acceptable; the game is shorter than the movie and makes the movie look like an Oscar winner in comparison. I've never seen a game so poorly put together, and above all I can't believe that they have the balls to charge full price for it. The game isn't worth the price of a movie ticket; it's not even worth the $5 it cost to buy the Burger King games. The BK games look like Bioshock in comparison and that's being kind.

Honestly, don't buy this game....don't rent it...don't play it. Are you an achievement whore looking for your next fix? It's true that you can get some very easy points and get them quick?...but know this, with each achievement you unlock, you lose another piece of your soul. Trust me on that, my soul is crying his eyes out and I don't know if he will ever be the same again. Also playing this game has helped me understand the movie. I can see why Sam Jackson wants to kill all the jumpers. If there were no jumpers then there would be no game and that's the kind of world I would want to live in.

Kush
http://pixelatedsausage.blogspot.com/

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