Bruce Geryk GameSpot Contributor	Now Playing: Warcraft III, Emperor of the Fading Suns, Uncommon Valor Tactics Ogre: The Knight of Lodis (GBA) Most Wanted: Master of Orion III, Combat Mission 2, Kingdom Hearts (PS2), Noble Armada Most Elves: Heroes of Might & Magic, Age of Wonders, EverQuest

Guest Column: Wake Me Up When the Story Is Over

I'm going to admit right up front that I did not finish Neverwinter Nights. I think I played it for about three days. Then, on day four, I just gave up, completely. But this isn't a game review, and I'm not required to finish games I hate if I'm not giving them a score at the end. I spent three days not liking this game, and now I'm done forever.

I know others disagree, but I now officially can't stand story in games. As in, any story. If I wanted to read a bad story about a faerie princess and her elf paladin boyfriend, I'd play that console game where the 8-year-olds save the world in their magic flying ships. And what's with the books? Get this: You click on the book in your inventory to read a story about the story you're reading while playing the computer game! I know it's not new, but that doesn't make it excusable. If you have to cram your written back story into actual in-game items, have the sense to just make my character read them and leave me out of it. Or take a hint from Warcraft III and put it all into the manual that I'm never going to read. The night elves are what? Sorry, not interested.

I like to limit my reading to the "book" format.

I read a message board post once about Dungeon Siege, where the poster said he wished he could just walk by some location in the general area of a quest, and he'd be credited with the quest being complete. I don't know if he was joking or not, but sign me up for that. At this point, there is just no story in any computer game that can hold my interest for more than about 10 minutes. I think I have become more intolerant recently, but dear God--how many times do I have to click on the stupid dialogue choice? No, I do not want to ask you some questions. I want to be healed, because I am almost dead. That is why I came through the magic portal. I also don't want to give you a note, because I already gave you that note.

I am sorry for carrying on like this, but every time I think about Neverwinter Nights, I get mad now. I got my character to 6th level in chapter 1 and then just said forget this.

			Which director invented Montage Theory? Lev Kuleshov Sergei Eisenstein V.I. Pudovkin Shut up and talk about games

I played a lot of Baldur's Gate, and I miss having a party of characters instead of just one. I know the one-character limitation in Neverwinter Nights is some kind of pen-and-paper thing so that everyone can log onto a dungeon, but for me that takes away 90 percent of the strategy that made Baldur's Gate so much fun. That game was a tactical battle simulator with magic in it. Yeah, you had to talk to some people, but whatever. It didn't get out of hand like in Neverwinter Nights. And the 3D battle thing now looks more cool and realistic, but that's not exactly a replacement for the strategy. And it doesn't really look all that cool, either. Not like Dungeon Siege, anyway.

Please shut up and heal me.

I have a new rule: Any time a game makes me do things I already do at work, when I'm done playing the game, the game should have done some of my work for me. The exact amount can be negotiable. If it's not actually making me do stuff I do at work, but instead is making me feel like I would rather be at work, then that's just as bad. I can get up from my computer at any time and go talk to someone. I cannot get up from my computer and go kill a scary monster. So you would think that a game--which exists solely to make me forget whatever it is I'm supposed to be doing at that time--would have less talking and more killing. It's stuff like this that makes me realize the genius of Diablo.

I think Diablo II is just so much better than Neverwinter Nights that it's not even funny. Yeah, Neverwinter Nights makes you do a lot more reading and elf-pretending, but these are two things I do not play computer games for to be able to do better. So brand me a heretic or insane. And, if you have time after that, screw Neverwinter Nights!