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| Bossjimbob
GuestSpotter
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Now Playing*: GTA: Vice City (PS2), BloodRayne (PS2), Halo (Xbox), Splinter Cell (Xbox), Hitman 2 (Xbox), Syberia (PC), Dungeon Siege (PC) *(also, giving my tired clubs a needed rest)
Most Wanted: Halo 2 (Xbox), Knights of the Old Republic (Xbox), Deus Ex 2 (PC), Day of Defeat (PC), Far Cry (PC), a free GameCube
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I never thought that I could relate to Vice City crime boss Tommy Vercetti in real life. Granted, his snappy wit and taste in fashion parallel my own for sure, but there has always been something not quite real about the way he moves. Perhaps it's those clublike hands he likes to wave around in people's faces, just before connecting with a jaw? After months and months of nonstop gaming and typing on my little laptop, I have come to understand why Tommy can't move his fingers: carpal tunnel syndrome.
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Somebody hasn't been wearing his splints to bed, has he? |
Yep, it happens to the best of us. Repeated motions, bad posture, cheap hardware, extended periods of activity--they all add up and eventually take their toll on a long, inconspicuous nerve that runs from the elbow through the wrist. Gangstas get trigger finger, and gamers get carpal tunnel. I can relate to this comparison, because after months of not heeding the advice of my therapist (and wife), I now suffer wrist pains, lost sensitivity in the fingertips and thumbs, and muscle soreness in the forearms. I go to bed looking like a dime-store version of the Six Million Dollar Man, arms both wrapped up in splints to give the overtaxed muscles and crushed median nerve a chance to heal in a "neutral position." Yeah, the thought of bionic hands seems promising, but given the cost of healthcare and the fact that most amputees get the hook, I'd rather keep my clubs intact. What can a self-proclaimed game authority do to correct such an affliction?
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I've become something...more than human! |
One would think that after spending so many years in the slammer, Tommy would have healed. A life of breaking rocks and stamping license plates surely would have stretched those constricted muscles and allowed the median nerve to heal, yes? Not necessarily. According to WebMD, mild cases can be treated through rest, massage, and use of hand splints. If, after weeks of unsuccessful home remedies and therapy, the condition does not improve, surgery or application of drugs can help. I doubt Mr. Vercetti's prison physician had spare time to teach Tommy hand massage techniques. In fact, Tommy most likely worsened his condition handling a shank, but that's another topic altogether. Gamers, on the other hand, have the benefit of going to the local drugstore, picking up some over-the-counter splints (after checking the fit and size--you should be able to fit two fingers under the splint so as not to constrict blood flow to the hand), and taking a much needed rest to catch up on some reading, Simpsons reruns, or other leisure-time activities.
PC gamers and console aficionados definitely stress different muscles through gameplay. Those who type on keyboards should elevate their chair to an appropriately comfortable height, use wrist pads, and take frequent breaks. Though I haven't read of any scientific evidence that extended use of the rumble feature on controllers causes damage, it has been proven that long-term usage of any type of device will cause muscle strain, inflammation, and eventual damage. Do yourself a favor, and take a break. There is an outside world.
So whether you lead a life of virtual crime or like to secretly hack away at that romance novel you've been meaning to finish, do yourself a favor and take care of your hands. They're the only ones you've got, and chances are, you'd rather not have them cut open by a quack due to something as unglamorous as "joystick finger." And now, I must bid thee farewell, for I have a date with aspirin and hand exercises...and that blasted vacuum that, according to my wife, won't aggravate my condition. Stupid lousy Hoover!
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