Thank You System Wars

deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20 · 2013-04-01 02:46:14

I put in an almost inordinate amount of effort into this prank, so how flattering it was when peole started to fall for it. How flattering it was when there was a five page argument over the Wii U caused by this. How flattering it was when all of you complimented the writing in this post (which, if I may be allowed a rare moment of immodestly, I think I nailed, particularly the quotes).So to everyone who posted and fell for this, thanks.To everyone who fell for this for just a while, thanks.To everyone who fell for this and then promptly proceeded to delete your posts when you realized it was an April Fools joke, thanks.To everyone who complimented me on the effort that went into making this thread, thanks.To everyone who argued and trolled in this thread, providing fodder to keep it alive, thanks.To the couple of people who helped me keep this thread alive right around when I made it, thanks.To everyone who copied my style of prank for their own prank threads, thanks.To the mod who locked this thread when it wasn't even four pages, no thanks whatsoever. To blue_hazy_basic, who was kind enough to unlock the thread for me, thanks.To all of you, to this complete forum who fell for this prank, if only for a second... thanks.Thank you everyone. This shall forever be remembered as the day when I successfully trolled System Wars with the most elaborately constructed prank in this forum's history by a single user ever.All hail me. Charizard1605, the man who won April Fools on System Wars.[Quote='Kotaku']Ahead of their fiscal year end briefing with the investors two weeks from now, Nintendo has announced thatit will be dropping the price of its Wii U console effective immediately; the Basic model, which offers 8 GB of storage, will now retail for $199, whereas the so called Deluxe Set, which offers 32 GB as well as a subscription to Nintendo's Deluxe Download Program, will now retail for $229. This $120 price cut for the Deluxe model effectively is the largest price cut a mainstream console has ever received, and it comes just four months after the console's launch.'It is our job as the platform holder to stimulate growth for the Wii U as a platform, and to provide quality content for our consumers, whether it comes from our internal studios, or our second and third party partners,' Nintendo of America President Reggie Fils-Aime said in a statement issued to the press. 'To ensure that the Wii U console's momentum is maintained, Nintendo has determined that this price cut is the best option going forward. At its new price point, Wii U now provides consumers with even more unprecedented value, whether it be via quality software such as Nintendo Land and New Super Mario Bros., innovative hardware such as the Wii U Pad, unprecedented services such as Miiverse and the Nintendo eShop, or just a healthy and rounded range of entertainment options such as Netflix, Hulu Plus, Amazon Video, all of which are provided via our Nintendo TVii software.'Speaking to the press in Japan, Iwata appeared apologetic. 'It pains me to take such a drastic measure so early in the system's lifespan,' he said, 'and particularly after the 3DS price cut, it may seem like part of a pre-meditated strategy on Nintendo's part. As such, I can understand any loss of consumer confidence that Nintendo will suffer. It was not my intention for Nintendo to lose goodwill with its consumers. Whereas I understand Nintendo will have to work hard to regain this trust going forward, in the meanwhile, I would like to apologize to our existing Wii U customers by offering them five free complementary Gamecube games, as well as any five SNES or N64 games of their choosing from a pre-determined selection.'Iwata's statement essentially confirms the Wii U Ambassador Program; the earlier 3DS Ambassador Program offered early 3DS adopters 10 free NES and 10 free GBA games over the eShop. The new Wii U Ambassador Program seems to be a bit more robust, offering as it does Wii U owners to pick five games of their own liking from a pool of SNES and N64 games, and offering them five Gamecube games to boot.The Wii U launched late last year. Following an unremarkable launch characterized by a strong retail performance, sales plummeted across the world, falling to as low as 59,000 units in the US in January. By December 31, 2012, Nintendo had sold 3 million Wii U systems worldwide, but it slashed forecasts for the system for the final quarter of its fiscal year.Nintendo's latest price drop may seem a bit depserate, especially in the wake of the widespread 'next generation' support that the PS4 and the next Xbox are getting, that is all skipping the Wii U, but it signals strong intent on Nintendo's part. It is also an aggressive move to stimulate sales for the slumping platform right at the beginning of the new fiscal year.Kotaku will have more for you on this, including details on the Ambassador Program, as it comes.Original PostSOURCE via NeoGAFHoly shit. Damn. I thought the 3DS price cut was bad, but this...How do you all feel about this? Is the Wii U worth it at the newer price points? Do you think it makes for a more attractive purchase? And for those who already own the system, how do they feel? Are you satisfied with the new Ambassador Program?

kuraimen

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#201 kuraimen

Member since 2010 • 28078 Posts

[QUOTE="kuraimen"]I ordered a WiiU because of this thread. I really hope you reimburse my money charizard.charizard1605

Send me your bank account and credit card numbers, and I will immediately send the money your way. If you have any PayPal information, send me that along with your Social Security number. All of this will ensure I can return your money to you as swiftly as possible.

Where should I send it? I've been dealing with some people in Nigeria and I've learned that it's best if you send me an email with the details for security.

11 years ago

deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

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#202 deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

Member since 2006 • 82724 Posts

[QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"]I ordered a WiiU because of this thread. I really hope you reimburse my money charizard.kuraimen

Send me your bank account and credit card numbers, and I will immediately send the money your way. If you have any PayPal information, send me that along with your Social Security number. All of this will ensure I can return your money to you as swiftly as possible.

Where should I send it? I've been dealing with some people in Nigeria and I've learned that it's best if you send me an email with the details for security.

Just post it here in this thread. Disguise it with lots of links to websites selling viagra knock offs.

11 years ago

super600

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#203 super600 Moderator

Member since 2007 • 33103 Posts

So, now Vita is the most expensive console
I wonder what Sony is thinking exactly
loosingENDS

April fools.

11 years ago

super600

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#204 super600 Moderator

Member since 2007 • 33103 Posts

[QUOTE="super600"]
[QUOTE="Silverbond"]
Charizard wins April Fools day.
Cherokee_Jack

And Youtube.

No, that was Arkane.

Obvious joke.

11 years ago

kuraimen

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#205 kuraimen

Member since 2010 • 28078 Posts

[QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"][QUOTE="charizard1605"] Send me your bank account and credit card numbers, and I will immediately send the money your way. If you have any PayPal information, send me that along with your Social Security number. All of this will ensure I can return your money to you as swiftly as possible.

Where should I send it? I've been dealing with some people in Nigeria and I've learned that it's best if you send me an email with the details for security.

Just post it here in this thread. Disguise it with lots of links to websites selling viagra knock offs.

That's brilliant! I always buy from those sites just because of the great offers even though I don't need Viagra of course.

11 years ago

deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

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#206 deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

Member since 2006 • 82724 Posts

[QUOTE="kuraimen"][QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"] Where should I send it? I've been dealing with some people in Nigeria and I've learned that it's best if you send me an email with the details for security.

Just post it here in this thread. Disguise it with lots of links to websites selling viagra knock offs.

That's brilliant! I always buy from those sites just because of the great offers even though I don't need Viagra of course.

I buy viagra knock offs in bulk, then package them as the real thing. I then sell them for half price, and rake in the profits. It prints money.

11 years ago

Michael0134567

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#207 Michael0134567

Member since 2008 • 28651 Posts

The best one this year. That's not saying much though.

11 years ago

kuraimen

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#208 kuraimen

Member since 2010 • 28078 Posts

[QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"][QUOTE="charizard1605"] Just post it here in this thread. Disguise it with lots of links to websites selling viagra knock offs.

That's brilliant! I always buy from those sites just because of the great offers even though I don't need Viagra of course.

I buy viagra knock offs in bulk, then package them as the real thing. I then sell them for half price, and rake in the profits. It prints money.

Mind =blown. I just ate them because I didn't know what to do with them but this is much better and I can go back to wearing briefs again.

11 years ago

deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

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#209 deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

Member since 2006 • 82724 Posts

[QUOTE="kuraimen"][QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"] That's brilliant! I always buy from those sites just because of the great offers even though I don't need Viagra of course.

I buy viagra knock offs in bulk, then package them as the real thing. I then sell them for half price, and rake in the profits. It prints money.

Mind =blown. I just ate them because I didn't know what to do with them but this is much better and I can go back to wearing briefs again.

Remember, if it stays up for more than four hours, cut it off, that means it's got gangrene.

11 years ago

kuraimen

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#210 kuraimen

Member since 2010 • 28078 Posts

[QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"][QUOTE="charizard1605"] I buy viagra knock offs in bulk, then package them as the real thing. I then sell them for half price, and rake in the profits. It prints money.

Mind =blown. I just ate them because I didn't know what to do with them but this is much better and I can go back to wearing briefs again.

Remember, if it stays up for more than four hours, cut it off, that means it's got gangrene.

You know after the sixth hour I started to wonder why I wasn't feeling my legs. Seems you solved the mystery for me. Thanks for the tip, I wish I knew that sooner though..

11 years ago

deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

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#211 deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

Member since 2006 • 82724 Posts

[QUOTE="kuraimen"][QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"] Mind =blown. I just ate them because I didn't know what to do with them but this is much better and I can go back to wearing briefs again.

Remember, if it stays up for more than four hours, cut it off, that means it's got gangrene.

You know after the sixth hour I started to wonder why I wasn't feeling my legs. Seems you solved the mystery for me. Thanks for the tip, I wish I knew that sooner though..

It can still be salvaged. Just make sure to hack your right ball off too. Only the right one though, not the left one.

11 years ago

kuraimen

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#212 kuraimen

Member since 2010 • 28078 Posts

[QUOTE="charizard1605"][QUOTE="kuraimen"][QUOTE="charizard1605"] Remember, if it stays up for more than four hours, cut it off, that means it's got gangrene.

You know after the sixth hour I started to wonder why I wasn't feeling my legs. Seems you solved the mystery for me. Thanks for the tip, I wish I knew that sooner though..

It can still be salvaged. Just make sure to hack your right ball off too. Only the right one though, not the left one.

I always liked the left one better anyways.

11 years ago

Rattlesnake_8

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#213 Rattlesnake_8

Member since 2004 • 18452 Posts

Saw this topic late, and obviously isn't real.. not sure how anyone would think it is.. quoted kotaku as though thats an account on here. Links posted in article were a nice touch, but obvious it's an April fools.

11 years ago

Cherokee_Jack

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#214 Cherokee_Jack

Member since 2008 • 32198 Posts

[QUOTE="Cherokee_Jack"]
[QUOTE="super600"]
And Youtube.
super600

No, that was Arkane.

Obvious joke.

Watch the video, it's the only good thing to come out of April Fools.

11 years ago

deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

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#215 deactivated-5d6bb9cb2ee20

Member since 2006 • 82724 Posts

Saw this topic late, and obviously isn't real.. not sure how anyone would think it is.. quoted kotaku as though thats an account on here. Links posted in article were a nice touch, but obvious it's an April fools.Rattlesnake_8

I always 'quote' news sites whenever I report on news. It's actually a fairly common thing.

11 years ago

LastRambo341

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