God of War 4 should be a comedy

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#1 Posted by PannicAtack (21021 posts) -

Ah, God of War, one of the playstation's most reliable franchises, always acclaimed and bound to sell copies, well-known for its visceral combat and its protagonist, Kratos. And now a new game is coming out, Ascension, but I can't help but feel that Sony doesn't really know what to do - they're just adding to the story and throwing in a multiplayer mode, but does this really breathe new life into the story?

So, here's my idea for what God of War could do for the inevitable God of War 4 that i feel would be a solid direction to take: God of War 4 should be a comedy. And you may ask "why?" Well, here are my reasons.

1. It's Greek!

As some have noted, the original God of War is modeled after a Greek Tragedy. As a trilogy, the series reflects the tradition of the Greek tragedy, which was, in many cases, a trilogy - see Sophocles and the Oedipus plays for example. But in the Greek theatre tradition, there was also often a fourth play, a satyr play, which was more comic. Richard Wagner imitated this structure in his famous Ring Cycle, which was four operas about the fall of the gods. The first, "Das Rheingold," is much more comic than the three that follow, which are filled with death, despair, and a bit of that hero's journey thing. So what better way to show faithfulness to the game's story inspiration than to make a "satyr game," then?

2. Think of the things from Greek mythology you could have show up!

Kratos hasn't killed everyone yet. There are still things you could have show up. There's Dionysus, the god of wine and revelry, and he could serve as an antagonist. You could have Apollo show up, and he could be all "Thanks a lot - you killed Helios and now I have to take up his slack. Also, give me back my friggin bow."

But there's more. There are those dumb sex minigames. Well, you could include Lysistrata, and when you try to initiate the sex minigame she could be all "nope." Or Calypso, who wouldn't let you leave afterwards.

You could have Odysseus show up, and then, as Odysseus was intelligent, not fight him, because he's smart enough not to fight the guy who's killed every other Greek hero he's come across.

3. Nobody takes the story seriously, and Kratos is a terrible character.

The first game did not have a great plot, but it was good for what it was, and had the decency to end with a satisfying resolution. The sequels, on the other hand, are pretty crappy in the plot department, in particular the third game, which was, to put it mildly, completely terrible. So if nobody in the audience is going to take the story seriously, then the writers shouldn't take it seriously, either. This could be a wonderful opportunity for the writers to have fun by mocking the franchise's wanton stupidity.

Similarly, Kratos is an awful character who displays no qualities that are remotely sympathetic. He's an ass with no redeeming qualities. So use a comedic game where his wanton psychopathy is played for laughs. Take his self-inflicted misery and make it funny. Have his tendency to murder everything he doesn't like turn out to be a hinderance. For example, say he needs to get through a door, and there's a guy with a key. He won't give it up, however, so Kratos kills him, but he accidentally breaks the key, meaning he can't get through the door.

4. The series is stagnant.

With Ascension having multiplayer tacked on despite no apparent, meaningful changes to the God of War formula, it's plain to see that the developers have run out of ideas. No surprise, given that all the games in the series have exactly the same gameplay and the same grim-faced seriousness, completely oblivious to the fact that its ongoing story is one that no one respects as a narrative. Making the game into a comedy would provide a wildly different tone, and in a series as stale as this, it would perhaps be a welcome change of pace.

So what do you say?

#2 Posted by kuraimen (28078 posts) -
Nice blog bro. I disagree 100%.
#3 Posted by Badosh (12733 posts) -
I'd play that.
#4 Posted by freedomfreak (40006 posts) -
That was a fun read. Sex mini-game idea was lulz. You should do this more often.
#5 Posted by TheGuardian03 (21684 posts) -
we get it you don't like god of war lol.
#6 Posted by PhazonBlazer (11704 posts) -

I would prefer a musical called Greece. It would follow the same story as Grease, in which Kratos and company find that true love can come from anywhere.

Also flying cars.

#7 Posted by DarkLink77 (31697 posts) -

I would play the f*ck out of that game.

Bravo, sir.

#8 Posted by ReadingRainbow4 (13823 posts) -

Ah, God of War, one of the playstation's most reliable franchises, always acclaimed and bound to sell copies, well-known for its visceral combat and its protagonist, Kratos. And now a new game is coming out, Ascension, but I can't help but feel that Sony doesn't really know what to do - they're just adding to the story and throwing in a multiplayer mode, but does this really breathe new life into the story?

So, here's my idea for what God of War could do for the inevitable God of War 4 that i feel would be a solid direction to take: God of War 4 should be a comedy. And you may ask "why?" Well, here are my reasons.

1. It's Greek!

As some have noted, the original God of War is modeled after a Greek Tragedy. As a trilogy, the series reflects the tradition of the Greek tragedy, which was, in many cases, a trilogy - see Sophocles and the Oedipus plays for example. But in the Greek theatre tradition, there was also often a fourth play, a satyr play, which was more comic. Richard Wagner imitated this structure in his famous Ring Cycle, which was four operas about the fall of the gods. The first, "Das Rheingold," is much more comic than the three that follow, which are filled with death, despair, and a bit of that hero's journey thing. So what better way to show faithfulness to the game's story inspiration than to make a "satyr game," then?

2. Think of the things from Greek mythology you could have show up!

Kratos hasn't killed everyone yet. There are still things you could have show up. There's Dionysus, the god of wine and revelry, and he could serve as an antagonist. You could have Apollo show up, and he could be all "Thanks a lot - you killed Helios and now I have to take up his slack. Also, give me back my friggin bow."

But there's more. There are those dumb sex minigames. Well, you could include Lysistrata, and when you try to initiate the sex minigame she could be all "nope." Or Calypso, who wouldn't let you leave afterwards.

You could have Odysseus show up, and then, as Odysseus was intelligent, not fight him, because he's smart enough not to fight the guy who's killed every other Greek hero he's come across.

3. Nobody takes the story seriously, and Kratos is a terrible character.

The first game did not have a great plot, but it was good for what it was, and had the decency to end with a satisfying resolution. The sequels, on the other hand, are pretty crappy in the plot department, in particular the third game, which was, to put it mildly, completely terrible. So if nobody in the audience is going to take the story seriously, then the writers shouldn't take it seriously, either. This could be a wonderful opportunity for the writers to have fun by mocking the franchise's wanton stupidity.

Similarly, Kratos is an awful character who displays no qualities that are remotely sympathetic. He's an ass with no redeeming qualities. So use a comedic game where his wanton psychopathy is played for laughs. Take his self-inflicted misery and make it funny. Have his tendency to murder everything he doesn't like turn out to be a hinderance. For example, say he needs to get through a door, and there's a guy with a key. He won't give it up, however, so Kratos kills him, but he accidentally breaks the key, meaning he can't get through the door.

4. The series is stagnant.

With Ascension having multiplayer tacked on despite no apparent, meaningful changes to the God of War formula, it's plain to see that the developers have run out of ideas. No surprise, given that all the games in the series have exactly the same dialogue and the same grim-faced seriousness, completely oblivious to the fact that its ongoing story is one that no one respects as a narrative. Making the game into a comedy would provide a wildly different tone, and in a series as stale as this, it would perhaps be a welcome change of pace.

So what do you say?

PannicAtack
God of war 4 can be about the national debt.
#9 Posted by heretrix (37346 posts) -

3. Nobody takes the story seriously, and Kratos is a terrible character.

PannicAtack

Truer words have never been said.

#10 Posted by MaskedPlayer (979 posts) -

GOTY!

Kratos needs to have a MR bean face!He should be voice acted by Rowan Aktinson!!

OMG the game will be amazing GOTY loaded and locked (Squirell guy who hates kinect reference)

#11 Posted by seanmcloughlin (38216 posts) -

Expected bullsh!t, actually got a good read lol. Honestly, I'd play that

They could hav GOW 4 in conjunction with Bohemia interactive where Kratos attacks the military and the government trying to free those imprisoned devs. Come on, who wouldn't play that? :P

And I agree, the series is becoming very stagnant. GOW III was fine but a huge dip in quality from what the first game was and the potential it had.

#12 Posted by IAmNot_fun (3336 posts) -
It is well on its way in becoming one, given how ridiculous the whole hope trash was in GoW 3.
#13 Posted by BrunoBRS (73260 posts) -
*insert divine comedy joke here*
#14 Posted by Rocker6 (13358 posts) -

Hah, was a good read, some good points backed up with subtle humor!

Nicely done, Pannic! ;)

#15 Posted by Jonwh18 (9350 posts) -

*insert divine comedy joke here*BrunoBRS
:lol: .... but kratos would kill that :?

#16 Posted by PannicAtack (21021 posts) -
[QUOTE="freedomfreak"]That was a fun read. Sex mini-game idea was lulz. You should do this more often.

Well, if you say so, I can certainly try.
#17 Posted by Rocker6 (13358 posts) -

[QUOTE="freedomfreak"]That was a fun read. Sex mini-game idea was lulz. You should do this more often.PannicAtack
Well, if you say so, I can certainly try.

That'd be nice! :)

A good piece of satire is always welcome in SW, as far as I'm concerned...

#18 Posted by Goyoshi12 (9687 posts) -

I have no idea what's going on but I'll just follow the herd and say this was a good read.

#19 Posted by McStrongfast (4270 posts) -
As a person who has no interest in anything God of War, I like this idea. I also like comedy, I find it amusing.
#20 Posted by PressXtoJump (1493 posts) -
I'd play that. Badosh
*tap* or press X etcetara
#21 Posted by TheDidact (3981 posts) -
I love this idea. Oh and Halo 5 should be an opera. Chief: I need a weeeeaaaaaaapppppppoooooooooooooooooooooooonnnnn!!!!
#22 Posted by jg4xchamp (47870 posts) -
Don't care for Ascension. God of War 3 was fun for what it was, but gameplay wise it's not even close to some of the genres best games. That and the story is horrendous considering how seriously santa monica takes it.
#23 Posted by BrunoBRS (73260 posts) -

[QUOTE="BrunoBRS"]*insert divine comedy joke here*Jonwh18

:lol: .... but kratos would kill that :?

i'd probably have come with something more witty to say if i wasn't burning inside a differential equations cIassroom at 95ºF (35ºC for the rest of the world)
#24 Posted by jg4xchamp (47870 posts) -
[QUOTE="Jonwh18"]

[QUOTE="BrunoBRS"]*insert divine comedy joke here*BrunoBRS

:lol: .... but kratos would kill that :?

i'd probably have come with something more witty to say if i wasn't burning inside a differential equations cIassroom at 95ºF (35ºC for the rest of the world)

95 sounds hotter. Clearly the better decision.
#25 Posted by BlbecekBobecek (2685 posts) -

[QUOTE="PannicAtack"]

3. Nobody takes the story seriously, and Kratos is a terrible character.

heretrix

Truer words have never been said.

On the other hands thats true about majority of videogames including Halo.

#26 Posted by BrunoBRS (73260 posts) -
[QUOTE="BrunoBRS"][QUOTE="Jonwh18"] :lol: .... but kratos would kill that :?jg4xchamp
i'd probably have come with something more witty to say if i wasn't burning inside a differential equations cIassroom at 95ºF (35ºC for the rest of the world)

95 sounds hotter. Clearly the better decision.

35 makes more sense though. like all measures that everyone but americans use, for that matter.
#27 Posted by FireSpirit117 (1981 posts) -
I would honestly play that nonstop. No joke.
#28 Posted by jg4xchamp (47870 posts) -
[QUOTE="BrunoBRS"][QUOTE="jg4xchamp"][QUOTE="BrunoBRS"] i'd probably have come with something more witty to say if i wasn't burning inside a differential equations cIassroom at 95ºF (35ºC for the rest of the world)

95 sounds hotter. Clearly the better decision.

35 makes more sense though. like all measures that everyone but americans use, for that matter.

Erroneous
#29 Posted by BrunoBRS (73260 posts) -
[QUOTE="jg4xchamp"][QUOTE="BrunoBRS"][QUOTE="jg4xchamp"] 95 sounds hotter. Clearly the better decision.

35 makes more sense though. like all measures that everyone but americans use, for that matter.

Erroneous

i agree, the american system is nothing short of wrong.
#30 Posted by PannicAtack (21021 posts) -

[QUOTE="heretrix"]

[QUOTE="PannicAtack"]

3. Nobody takes the story seriously, and Kratos is a terrible character.

BlbecekBobecek

Truer words have never been said.

On the other hands thats true about majority of videogames including Halo.

Honestly, God of War 3 is pretty bad, even by the already low standards of video game stories.
#31 Posted by Zeviander (9503 posts) -
Well, you could include Lysistrata, and when you try to initiate the sex minigame she could be all "nope."PannicAtack
:lol: Also, absolutely brilliant idea. I'd buy first day.
#32 Posted by cainetao11 (17341 posts) -
Nice! Funny OP. I am looking forward to GoW A
#33 Posted by mccoyca112 (5433 posts) -

I love this idea. Oh and Halo 5 should be an opera. Chief: I need a weeeeaaaaaaapppppppoooooooooooooooooooooooonnnnn!!!!TheDidact

Mass effect would be better. Harbinger: Do, re, me, fa, so, la, te, do, La

On topic. Yeah, I'd give it a whirl. But outside of the people here, people do actually enjoy that over the top nonsense that is god of war, so a spinoff would probably be for the best.

#34 Posted by tryagainlater (7445 posts) -

As a fan of God of War, I agree 100%. The story is already crap so they may as well have fun with it.

#35 Posted by metroidfood (11173 posts) -

I would prefer a musical called Greece. It would follow the same story as Grease, in which Kratos and company find that true love can come from anywhere.

Also flying cars.

PhazonBlazer

Sony are you writing this down?!

#36 Posted by HaloPimp978 (7287 posts) -

GOW4 as a comedy? I would play that.

#37 Posted by Dead-Memories (6586 posts) -

i can assure you, the multiplayer is not tacked on it looks **** great. i'm looking forward to it specifically for the MP, the campaign will be a bit of dumb fun i suppose, just like the three GOW's before it. but the multiplayer is what to look forward to in this installment imo, same thing with most PS3 exclusives, Uncharted, Killzone, etc.

#38 Posted by King_Dodongo (3267 posts) -
God of war is the lamest franchise ever, so no surprises.
#39 Posted by Zassimick (6450 posts) -

Scrap Kratos and you've sold me. A game in the style of a comedy would be incredible but Kratos would drag it down. Get a new leading man in there, one that would support the comedy well, and you're golden.

#40 Posted by 1PMrFister (3134 posts) -
[QUOTE="PannicAtack"][QUOTE="freedomfreak"]That was a fun read. Sex mini-game idea was lulz. You should do this more often.

Well, if you say so, I can certainly try.

System Wars Magazine is always looking for new writers, just saying.
#41 Posted by rjdofu (9170 posts) -

[QUOTE="PannicAtack"]

3. Nobody takes the story seriously, and Kratos is a terrible character.

heretrix

Truer words have never been said.

"Never been said". Oh really?
#42 Posted by skrat_01 (33767 posts) -
It's pretty dumb. That's for sure.
#43 Posted by getyeryayasout (7359 posts) -

I could see it working as a comedy...work in a joke about accidentally circumcising himself with The Blades of Chaos while he's jerking***. Gets a laugh from me every time.

#44 Posted by Malta_1980 (11242 posts) -

All i have to say is cant wait for GOW:Ascension and wouldnt mind GOW4 :)

#46 Posted by Liquid_ (2578 posts) -

Developers run out of ideas because they impliment multiplayer for the first time? What?

#47 Posted by II_Seraphim_II (20493 posts) -
Yes its so terrible thats why every single game in the main series is AAA. >.>
#48 Posted by PannicAtack (21021 posts) -
Yes its so terrible thats why every single game in the main series is AAA. >.>II_Seraphim_II
Scores are nice, but that doesn't really counter any points about how the series hasn't changed a lick since 2005, or how the story and characters are terrible.
#49 Posted by Heil68 (43966 posts) -
Pre-ordered CE edition, can't wait. Thank you Sony.
#50 Posted by Crazyguy105 (9513 posts) -

Calypso wouldn't allow Kratos to leave. lol

I agree with this 100%. Get to it Sony.