Why can't most females ever be bothered to make the first move?

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#1 Posted by FrenchDynasty (1383 posts) -

Not all, there are a few women who do make the first move but their a rare form. it seems like the majority expect a guy to approach them. Why can't a woman ever approach a guy and make an effort? seems like they just lean back and have all these expectations that its the guys job to approach them. If they are all about gender equality and who not it shouldn't even matter

#2 Posted by xLFTMx (987 posts) -

Because girls dont have to.

A hot chick can have 10 guys in a bar competing for her. Its your job to stand out.

Chicks can get a guy in almost any situation. Guys cant. So you take initiative.

#3 Posted by Hemmaroids (3174 posts) -

Because girls dont have to.

A hot chick can have 10 guys in a bar competing for her. Its your job to stand out.

Chicks can get a guy in almost any situation. Guys cant. So you take initiative.

xLFTMx
Not true, I have competition from 12 different girls who all try and get me.
#4 Posted by sambo2011 (411 posts) -

just cause....

#5 Posted by xLFTMx (987 posts) -

[QUOTE="xLFTMx"]

Because girls dont have to.

A hot chick can have 10 guys in a bar competing for her. Its your job to stand out.

Chicks can get a guy in almost any situation. Guys cant. So you take initiative.

Hemmaroids

Not true, I have competition from 12 different girls who all try and get me.

Trannys dont count.

#6 Posted by darkfox101 (7055 posts) -
But equal rights
#7 Posted by Allicrombie (25560 posts) -
its like survivor, you have to be the one that doesnt get voted off the island.
#8 Posted by Wii4Fun (1472 posts) -

Maybe chivalry isn't as dead as people think...

#9 Posted by Wilfred_Owen (20915 posts) -
When in doubt go shirtless. That goes for both genders.
#10 Posted by xLFTMx (987 posts) -

Maybe chivalry isn't as dead as people think...

Wii4Fun

Chivalrys not dead, but its sure as hell out of style.

#11 Posted by MistressMinako (45922 posts) -

We do, but it is not as often as the other way around, I guess. Some girls might like you, some don't. We are about as shy and you guys are when it comes to guys. I don't know why people think all girls wait for guys to ask them. Girls don't want to be embarrassed either when a guy rejects them. So that is why a lot of them don't even try.

#12 Posted by rawsavon (40002 posts) -
That's odd. Every GF I have ever had has made the first move. Girls buy me drinks at the bar quite often Girls usually ask me to dance first ...maybe TC's version of 'the truth' is not indicative of all females and their approach (or a lack there of) to men
#13 Posted by FrenchDynasty (1383 posts) -

We do, but it is not as often as the other way around, I guess. Some girls might like you, some don't. We are about as shy and you guys are when it comes to guys. I don't know why people think all girls wait for guys to ask them. Girls don't want to be embarrassed either when a guy reject them. So that is why a lot of them don't even try. MistressMinako

Not all of them wait, but the majority do. I know a girl who liked this guy in one of my college classes and every day she'd ramble on about how much she liked him and how she hoped that he'd ask her out soon. Needless to say he never even acknowledged her really and she didn't do anything. I've met a bunch of other girls like that who rather than work up the courage to approach a male just sit on their hands and wait to be approached

#14 Posted by lancelot200 (61977 posts) -
It's their preference.
#15 Posted by 194197844077667059316682358889 (49173 posts) -
[QUOTE="rawsavon"]That's odd. Every GF I have ever had has made the first move. Girls buy me drinks at the bar quite often Girls usually ask me to dance first ...maybe TC's version of 'the truth' is not indicative of all females and their approach (or a lack there of) to men

My experience is approximately analogous to yours
#16 Posted by Engrish_Major (17368 posts) -
In my case, they usually do. It just so happens that the first move is away.
#17 Posted by rawsavon (40002 posts) -
[QUOTE="rawsavon"]That's odd. Every GF I have ever had has made the first move. Girls buy me drinks at the bar quite often Girls usually ask me to dance first ...maybe TC's version of 'the truth' is not indicative of all females and their approach (or a lack there of) to menxaos
My experience is approximately analogous to yours

Perhaps this is actually a 'TC' thread and not a 'girl' thread
#18 Posted by Engrish_Major (17368 posts) -
Oh, and I forgot to amend to my previous statement the obligatory foreveralone.jpg.
#19 Posted by Allicrombie (25560 posts) -
In my case, they usually do. It just so happens that the first move is away.Engrish_Major
haha nice.
#20 Posted by MistressMinako (45922 posts) -

[QUOTE="MistressMinako"]We do, but it is not as often as the other way around, I guess. Some girls might like you, some don't. We are about as shy and you guys are when it comes to guys. I don't know why people think all girls wait for guys to ask them. Girls don't want to be embarrassed either when a guy reject them. So that is why a lot of them don't even try. FrenchDynasty

Not all of them wait, but the majority do. I know a girl who liked this guy in one of my college classes and every day she'd ramble on about how much she liked him and how she hoped that he'd ask her out soon. Needless to say he never even acknowledged her really and she didn't do anything. I've met a bunch of other girls like that who rather than work up the courage to approach a male just sit on their hands and wait to be approached

Well, that's her fault and anyone else who thinks that. Just because a girl likes a guy doesn't mean that he likes her. She should have went up to him and tried to start something seeing as he wasn't budging. They can wait all they want, but if you aren't some glamorous pin up celebrity doll, they aren't getting many men all over them.
#21 Posted by xLFTMx (987 posts) -

In my case, they usually do. It just so happens that the first move is away.Engrish_Major

I giggled. :)

#22 Posted by rawsavon (40002 posts) -

[QUOTE="Engrish_Major"]In my case, they usually do. It just so happens that the first move is away.Allicrombie
haha nice.

ITT Alii positions herself in the exact opposite direction of Engrish
[spoiler] with a club and chloroform in hand [/spoiler]

#23 Posted by FrenchDynasty (1383 posts) -

[QUOTE="xaos"][QUOTE="rawsavon"]That's odd. Every GF I have ever had has made the first move. Girls buy me drinks at the bar quite often Girls usually ask me to dance first ...maybe TC's version of 'the truth' is not indicative of all females and their approach (or a lack there of) to menrawsavon
My experience is approximately analogous to yours

Perhaps this is actually a 'TC' thread and not a 'girl' thread

Lol! good one, There is no doubt that I am all man and have no problem with the womans 8)

I just don't understand this american dating culture, totally different in France :|

#24 Posted by Grodus5 (7934 posts) -

I'm going with prom with a girl that asked me this year. About the only time the girl has every made the first move on me.

#25 Posted by rawsavon (40002 posts) -

[QUOTE="rawsavon"][QUOTE="xaos"] My experience is approximately analogous to yoursFrenchDynasty

Perhaps this is actually a 'TC' thread and not a 'girl' thread

Lol! good one, There is no doubt that I am all man

I never said that you were a transsexual/transgendered person :?
...never even crossed my mind till now tbh (not that there is anything wrong with that)

My point was that people will often extrapolate from their own experiences and try to generalize from there (human nature).
However, this is a flawed approach that often results in erroneous judgments that prove difficult to change due to cognitive dissonance (where conflicting information is often ignored)

#26 Posted by FrenchDynasty (1383 posts) -

[QUOTE="FrenchDynasty"]

[QUOTE="rawsavon"] Perhaps this is actually a 'TC' thread and not a 'girl' threadrawsavon

Lol! good one, There is no doubt that I am all man

I never said that you were a transsexual/transgendered person :?
...never even crossed my mind till now tbh (not that there is anything wrong with that)

My point was that people will often extrapolate from their own experiences and try to generalize from there (human nature).
However, this is a flawed approach that often results in erroneous judgments that prove difficult to change due to cognitive dissonance (where conflicting information is often ignored)

I didn't mean all man like that... I meant all man as in being good with women, you know gettin them digits 8)

All man as in experienced with women, the cool kind of all man

#27 Posted by Overlord93 (12602 posts) -
I guess the steroetype is that it is the man that makes the move, from the old days when men would pretty much just pick out women for their own. From the answers in this thread its apparent that it is not so prevelant now though
#28 Posted by rawsavon (40002 posts) -

[QUOTE="rawsavon"]

[QUOTE="FrenchDynasty"]

Lol! good one, There is no doubt that I am all man FrenchDynasty

I never said that you were a transsexual/transgendered person :?
...never even crossed my mind till now tbh (not that there is anything wrong with that)

My point was that people will often extrapolate from their own experiences and try to generalize from there (human nature).
However, this is a flawed approach that often results in erroneous judgments that prove difficult to change due to cognitive dissonance (where conflicting information is often ignored)

I didn't mean all man like that... I meant all man as in being good with women, you know gettin them digits 8)

All man as in experienced with women, the cool kind of all man

Wait.

Are you saying that transgendered and transsexual men are not cool?
Or
Aare you saying that those men not experienced with women are not cool?

#29 Posted by FrenchDynasty (1383 posts) -

[QUOTE="FrenchDynasty"]

[QUOTE="rawsavon"]

I never said that you were a transsexual/transgendered person :?
...never even crossed my mind till now tbh (not that there is anything wrong with that)

My point was that people will often extrapolate from their own experiences and try to generalize from there (human nature).
However, this is a flawed approach that often results in erroneous judgments that prove difficult to change due to cognitive dissonance (where conflicting information is often ignored)

rawsavon

I didn't mean all man like that... I meant all man as in being good with women, you know gettin them digits 8)

All man as in experienced with women, the cool kind of all man

Wait.

Are you saying that transgendered and transsexual men are not cool?
Or
Aare you saying that those men not experienced with women are not cool?

Neither.

All i'm saying is I'm all man in the sense that I go to clubs lookin fly, gettin digits, rollin up in my benz on 24's. Pimping you know?

#30 Posted by rawsavon (40002 posts) -

[QUOTE="rawsavon"]

[QUOTE="FrenchDynasty"]

I didn't mean all man like that... I meant all man as in being good with women, you know gettin them digits 8)

All man as in experienced with women, the cool kind of all man

FrenchDynasty

Wait.

Are you saying that transgendered and transsexual men are not cool?
Or
Aare you saying that those men not experienced with women are not cool?

Neither.

All i'm saying is I'm all man in the sense that I go to clubs lookin fly, gettin digits, rollin up in my benz on 24's. Pimping you know?

Oh. I see.
Well I am glad we have settled on what is 'cool'.

Though the OP combined with your last few posts does have me confused.
They seem a bit...contradictory

#31 Posted by DigitalExile (16049 posts) -

Girls have never made the first move with me, but that's because they've never been interested. One said she would have "eventually" if I didn't, but ... eh.

#32 Posted by 194197844077667059316682358889 (49173 posts) -

All i'm saying is I'm all man in the sense that I go to clubs lookin fly, gettin digits, rollin up in my benz on 24's. Pimping you know?

FrenchDynasty
No, I do not know. :o
#33 Posted by michael_1234576 (8621 posts) -
I've never made the first move on a girl.
#34 Posted by Ballroompirate (23745 posts) -

The only women that made the first move on me are....needless to say they are old enough to be my mom....it makes me a sad panda

and no they weren't attractive.

#35 Posted by grape_of_wrath (3756 posts) -
They don't have the balls for it. [spoiler] Oh har har [/spoiler]
#36 Posted by l0ve (3174 posts) -
Im currently waiting for a girl to make the first move, well I'm expecting it anyway lol. Poor girl I hate to break her heart :(
#37 Posted by SkyHalcyon (12 posts) -
Personally, I feel like if I asked a guy out, he might just say yes because it's like "Oh hey, I guess she's okay." But if I was interested in a guy and he approached me, then I would know that it was mutual and not just like "Oh, okay." I realize this is sort of stupid because guys probably feel the same way, but that's why I tend to be too much of a wuss to make the first move. Dunno if it's the same for everyone, though.
#38 Posted by kayoticdreamz (3347 posts) -
this yet another thing i wonder about girls....though admittely as pointed out if a girl is hot they can easily go into a bar and have like 5 or 10 guys hang on them. but ive seen the oppossite too not near as often but a hot guy can just get a ton of hot girls hang on him. i do agree if equal rights are the thing here then they should make the first move sometimes not always the lopsidedness of it all. oh well thats nature i guess animals the guys usually duke it out to mate with a female. and we humans arent that different i guess.
#39 Posted by Suzy_Q_Kazoo (9901 posts) -

It's not so much that I expect guys to make the first move, but rather that I'm afraid to do so. Yeah, I'm lame like that, but I'm not discontent about where it puts me or anything; I accept it. I think I tend to kind of be an awkward person anyways, so maybe it's for the best :P

#40 Posted by sonofsmeagle (4317 posts) -
its like survivor, you have to be the one that doesnt get voted off the island.Allicrombie
I couldnt have said it better myself bravo :lol: But yeh i do wish girls would make the 1st move more than guys, stuff like this happened all through highschool there were alot of girls that liked me at the time that were waiting for me to make the 1st move
#41 Posted by sonofsmeagle (4317 posts) -
Im currently waiting for a girl to make the first move, well I'm expecting it anyway lol. Poor girl I hate to break her heart :( l0ve
So your 40 and havnt had a date yet?
#42 Posted by BlindBluMonstah (13825 posts) -

i dont make 1st moves simply because its effort, but if there was someone worth making the effort for then id do it :)

#43 Posted by gpuFX16 (1296 posts) -

In my case, they usually do. It just so happens that the first move is away.Engrish_Major


Story of my life...

#44 Posted by Mr_Cumberdale (10189 posts) -
Not necessarily true. I've never approached a girl, yet had several approach me. Of course I declined because relationships are a waste of time.
#45 Posted by l0ve (3174 posts) -
[QUOTE="l0ve"]Im currently waiting for a girl to make the first move, well I'm expecting it anyway lol. Poor girl I hate to break her heart :( sonofsmeagle
So your 40 and havnt had a date yet?

Im 20 and there is a girl in one of my classes who has quite an obvious crush on me, I try to avoid her however since I'm not interested. She has been getting more and more pushy though so I'm expecting her to go further sometime soon.
#46 Posted by F1_2004 (8009 posts) -
It's a good system. Women show some interest, and men make the first move. If the girl's not interested, she doesn't pay attention to him and he doesn't have to make an arse out of himself. If the guy's not interested, he doesn't ask her out and she doesn't have to make an ass out of herself by asking him out. The system doesn't work only when the guy is too chicken **** to ask the girl out, in which case the girl rightly looks for a manlier man who has the cojones to do it.
#47 Posted by jak275 (431 posts) -
Because of social standards.
#48 Posted by Hexagon_777 (20106 posts) -
I have had one chick make the first move on me before and she ended up being a total *****. I wish more girls made the first move but I suppose doing the picking yourself does have its benefits too to avoid *******.
#49 Posted by optiow (28284 posts) -
It is an old social convention. Males have always been seen as dominant throughout history, and so it has been up to the males to make a move on women, because we used to have the right to choose.
#50 Posted by Hemmaroids (3174 posts) -

[QUOTE="Hemmaroids"][QUOTE="xLFTMx"]

Because girls dont have to.

A hot chick can have 10 guys in a bar competing for her. Its your job to stand out.

Chicks can get a guy in almost any situation. Guys cant. So you take initiative.

xLFTMx

Not true, I have competition from 12 different girls who all try and get me.

Trannys dont count.

Haha I know.