It took me a really long time to realize this but our lives are pointless. I was looking at these fish in a fish bowl one day and I was like, wow they have really pointless lives. All they do all day is swim around in that small inclosed fishbowl eat, sleep, and sh!t until they die. Then I looked at human life and realized it was really no different.
When I was younger I had high ambitions and goals for when I got older but as I got older I realized no matter how hard I try or how hard I work I am going to end up in the same place as everyone else, 6 feet under ground. Then there is the afterlife(if one really exists) were we worship a god for all eternity, yes master no master. I hate my boss and don't like being told what to do. Living knowing that's the way it's going to be forever doesn't excite me. I want to be my own boss my own god.
A healer once said some people progress through light and some people progress through darkness. Ones who progress through darkness loving and kind deeds only hinder thier progression. It's not necassary a bad thing though because he thought it needs to be this way for the other to exist. Without light there can be no darkness and vice versa. It's like the ying and yang emposing forces empower each other. I think I am one of those people who progress through darkness. I think positive and nothing but bad things happen to me. I have a negative thinking attitude and good comes from it. Is this how it's meant to be?
God forgive me but it's wrong but I plan to die, Either take me in heaven and understand I was a G' did the best I could, raised in insanity or send me to hell cause I ain't beggin' for my life Ain't nothing worse then this cursed ass hopeless life. - Tupac Shakur
Is hell really that much worse then living here on earth?