What do you OT members seek in a relationship ?

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#1 Posted by Young_Charter (19889 posts) -

A relationship between two can come with a package of needs, wants, and all kinds of desires. What do you guys require ?

  • Cuddling ?
  • Companionship ?
  • Bonding ?
  • Conversation ? 
  • Romance ? 
  • Gaming ? 
  • Activities ? 
  • Chemistry ? 
  • Expression ?
  • Control ? 
  • Other ? 

Explain to us all your desires and needs . .  .

 

#2 Posted by indzman (18943 posts) -

loving, caring and sweet. Thats all i care about or need in a relationship.

#3 Posted by GD1551 (9155 posts) -

Control and dominance, I mean there's really nothing better than controlling a person and having them at your beck and call for anything. It's a feeling that cannot be replicated by any other means.

#4 Posted by AussieePet (11424 posts) -
Serious relationship and fun and trust and faithful
#5 Posted by konvikt_17 (22279 posts) -

Sex

#6 Posted by IdioticIcarus (2242 posts) -
Well it depends on the other person and what kind of relationship you speak of, and probably what else is going on in my life at the time as well.
#7 Posted by raymanproguy (13 posts) -
I want someone who is loyal, someone is can express their emotions, but at the same time control them. I don't date anybody who cries. That is the first sign that, that person is pathetic and weak. To be quite honest, I don't care for conversation either. So many people disappoint me on an intellect level that I just ignore everybody. Now that I am on that subject, I want that person to understand when we move together there will be two separate rooms for both of us. The only time we enter each others' room is to give into our sexual needs. Someone who is loyal is nice too obviously, someone who cooks and clean is a plus too. That's really the top things that I look for, if I can think of more then I will post more
#8 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -
Broadly speaking, I care about physical intimacy (which doesn't have to be sexual), emotional intimacy, and companionship. As for the people I'm interested in, I like folks who are empathetic, like-minded, emotionally mature, open, compassionate, and adventurous.
#9 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -
I don't date anybody who cries. That is the first sign that, that person is pathetic and weak.raymanproguy
Oh, and someone who isn't an insensitive dipsh!t like this person.
#10 Posted by Chuubby (416 posts) -
[QUOTE="raymanproguy"]I don't date anybody who cries. That is the first sign that, that person is pathetic and weak.ghoklebutter
Oh, and someone who isn't an insensitive dipsh!t like this person.

Tears are just gods piss raining down your face. In other words, when you cry God is pissing on your face because he is disgusted in how weak you are. John 22.3.5.1
#11 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -
[QUOTE="ghoklebutter"][QUOTE="raymanproguy"]I don't date anybody who cries. That is the first sign that, that person is pathetic and weak.Chuubby
Oh, and someone who isn't an insensitive dipsh!t like this person.

Tears are just gods piss raining down your face. In other words, when you cry God is pissing on your face because he is disgusted in how weak you are. John 22.3.5.1

lol what
#12 Posted by soulless4now (41381 posts) -

Warmth and comfort. 

#13 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -

Warmth and comfort. 

soulless4now
I think my preferences can be better summarized as this, plus an adventurous and open personality. Maybe I'm asking for a bit too much. >_>
#14 Posted by Chuubby (416 posts) -

[QUOTE="Chuubby"][QUOTE="ghoklebutter"] Oh, and someone who isn't an insensitive dipsh!t like this person.ghoklebutter
Tears are just gods piss raining down your face. In other words, when you cry God is pissing on your face because he is disgusted in how weak you are. John 22.3.5.1

lol what

Don't laugh in the lords name, it's really insulting for hard working christians such as myself to see infadel scum like yourself piss over all my religion. :|

#15 Posted by raymanproguy (13 posts) -

[QUOTE="raymanproguy"]I don't date anybody who cries. That is the first sign that, that person is pathetic and weak.ghoklebutter
Oh, and someone who isn't an insensitive dipsh!t like this person.

Maybe you are the one who is too sensitive. Look at how much emotion you are displaying. Control yourself, I'm not **** on your preference despite the fact you are constantly listing these different emotions that just disgusts me about human beings.

#16 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -

[QUOTE="ghoklebutter"][QUOTE="raymanproguy"]I don't date anybody who cries. That is the first sign that, that person is pathetic and weak.raymanproguy

Oh, and someone who isn't an insensitive dipsh!t like this person.

Maybe you are the one who is too sensitive. Look at how much emotion you are displaying. Control yourself, I'm not **** on your preference despite the fact you are constantly listing these different emotions that just disgusts me about human beings.

At least I'm not the one who thinks that people who cry are reprehensible. >_>
#17 Posted by soulless4now (41381 posts) -
[QUOTE="soulless4now"]

Warmth and comfort. 

ghoklebutter
I think my preferences can be better summarized as this, plus an adventurous and open personality. Maybe I'm asking for a bit too much. >_>

Yeah that and emotionally stable. I won't want a clinger either. >.> And Yusuke! <3
#18 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -
[QUOTE="ghoklebutter"][QUOTE="soulless4now"]

Warmth and comfort. 

soulless4now
I think my preferences can be better summarized as this, plus an adventurous and open personality. Maybe I'm asking for a bit too much. >_>

Yeah that and emotionally stable. I won't want a clinger either. >.> And Yusuke! <3

Eh, I kind of like people who are slightly clingy. I mean, I like my space and all, but I'm clingy myself, so I like clingy people. I don't think they are necessarily emotionally unstable, either, but they usually are in my experience. But to each his/her own.
#19 Posted by KiIIyou (27151 posts) -
oooh cuddling? yes please. Other things too involving happiness.
#20 Posted by Ring_of_fire (15664 posts) -
Companionship, someone that can provide emotional support when I am in certain moods (I get stressed very easily at times), and someone who is relatively intelligent.
#21 Posted by -Renegade (8340 posts) -

somebody to love

#22 Posted by soulless4now (41381 posts) -
[QUOTE="ghoklebutter"][QUOTE="soulless4now"][QUOTE="ghoklebutter"] I think my preferences can be better summarized as this, plus an adventurous and open personality. Maybe I'm asking for a bit too much. >_>

Yeah that and emotionally stable. I won't want a clinger either. >.> And Yusuke! <3

Eh, I kind of like people who are slightly clingy. I mean, I like my space and all, but I'm clingy myself, so I like clingy people. I don't think they are necessarily emotionally unstable, either, but they usually are in my experience. But to each his/her own.

I didn't mean the clingers are emotionally unstable. I was just saying I wouldn't want someone who was emotionally unstable. :P
#23 Posted by lo_Pine (5048 posts) -
Like attitudes/philosophy. Intelligence and $$$
#24 Posted by whiskeystrike (12068 posts) -

Consent

er um

wait

#25 Posted by whiskeystrike (12068 posts) -

Warmth and comfort. 

soulless4now
so fat people
#26 Posted by ShadowDeathX (10692 posts) -

Someone who wants me, but doesn't need me.

Independent + Independent = My Ideal Relationship.

So what I want is;

  • Someone who can take care of themselves.
  • Has a life of their own.
  • Someone who is NOT super emotional or attachy.
  • Open-minded.
  • Can argue in a logical sense and support their side properly.
  • Someone who has their own bank account and doesn't need to seek mine.
  • Someone who trusts me and doesn't invade my privacy.

A relationship built on love, trust, and respect for one another. A relationship that is benefitical to both of us BUT not the reason for living.

This kind of relationship is hard to find. Ugh...so many women are so traditional.

#27 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -
[QUOTE="soulless4now"]

Warmth and comfort. 

whiskeystrike
so fat people

I know some fat people who are actually quite cold (in regards to either personality or body temperature or both).
#28 Posted by LZ71 (10316 posts) -

Am I the only one who always has trouble with these kinds of lists?

When I make general lists, they're just kind of boring. "Smart, funny, good listener..." Stuff I'd imagine most people are looking for. And I don't like specific lists where I try and name every single attribute of the person I want to be in a relationship with, because honestly I have no idea yet specifically what kind of person I would truly be happy with. I say today I want someone who's adventurous and loves to travel, but I don't know what I'll be like in the future. Maybe that's because I don't have a wealth of experience yet though.

But regardless, I'll make a go of it. I think the few key things I'm looking for are honesty, trust, and an open mind. I think I could work around a lot of specifics if those three things are golden.

#29 Posted by megaspiderweb09 (3686 posts) -

Someone who wants me, but doesn't need me.

Independent + Independent = My Ideal Relationship.

So what I want is;

  • Someone who can take care of themselves.
  • Has a life of their own.
  • Someone who is NOT super emotional or attachy.
  • Open-minded.
  • Can argue in a logical sense and support their side properly.
  • Someone who has their own bank account and doesn't need to seek mine.
  • Someone who trusts me and doesn't invade my privacy.

A relationship built on love, trust, and respect for one another. A relationship that is benefitical to both of us BUT not the reason for living.

This kind of relationship is hard to find. Ugh...so many women are so traditional.

ShadowDeathX

I like your way of thinking, perhaps you should come over here in England, the women you describe are here. However you have one huge impression to give

#30 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -
Am I the only one who always has trouble with these kinds of lists? When I make general lists, they're just kind of boring. "Smart, funny, good listener..." Stuff I'd imagine most people are looking for. And I don't like specific lists where I try and name every single attribute of the person I want to be in a relationship with, because honestly I have no idea yet specifically what kind of person I would truly be happy with. I say today I want someone who's adventurous and loves to travel, but I don't know what I'll be like in the future. Maybe that's because I don't have a wealth of experience yet though. But regardless, I'll make a go of it. I think the few key things I'm looking for are honesty, trust, and an open mind. I think I could work around a lot of specifics if those three things are golden. LZ71
Good point. And another problem with these lists is that they can be very limiting in nature. There are a few essential things I desire in partners, but when I expand them all the way, it's pretty much impossible for me to be open to people who aren't exactly what I wish for.
#31 Posted by ShadowDeathX (10692 posts) -

[QUOTE="ShadowDeathX"]

Someone who wants me, but doesn't need me.

Independent + Independent = My Ideal Relationship.

So what I want is;

  • Someone who can take care of themselves.
  • Has a life of their own.
  • Someone who is NOT super emotional or attachy.
  • Open-minded.
  • Can argue in a logical sense and support their side properly.
  • Someone who has their own bank account and doesn't need to seek mine.
  • Someone who trusts me and doesn't invade my privacy.

A relationship built on love, trust, and respect for one another. A relationship that is benefitical to both of us BUT not the reason for living.

This kind of relationship is hard to find. Ugh...so many women are so traditional.

megaspiderweb09

I like your way of thinking, perhaps you should come over here in England, the women you describe are here. However you have one huge impression to give

Well Thank You ^^... I'm still finishing off my studies for now, so finding a mate is not my priority. If it does come to my path, I wouldn't mind. Once I finish my studies, I'll be traveling a lot. :) England I shall visit.
#32 Posted by Master_ShakeXXX (13361 posts) -

I prefer a good looking girl with needs. One whose affection can be bought and her desire to be with me depending solely upon the size of my checkbook.

#33 Posted by MgamerBD (17550 posts) -
Sex Conversation Sex Fun Sex Chill Sex Be faithful Give me my space Sex Stay pretty Great sex Support me no matter what
#34 Posted by soulless4now (41381 posts) -
so fat peoplewhiskeystrike
Wrong.
#35 Posted by LZ71 (10316 posts) -

 

[QUOTE="LZ71"]Am I the only one who always has trouble with these kinds of lists? When I make general lists, they're just kind of boring. "Smart, funny, good listener..." Stuff I'd imagine most people are looking for. And I don't like specific lists where I try and name every single attribute of the person I want to be in a relationship with, because honestly I have no idea yet specifically what kind of person I would truly be happy with. I say today I want someone who's adventurous and loves to travel, but I don't know what I'll be like in the future. Maybe that's because I don't have a wealth of experience yet though. But regardless, I'll make a go of it. I think the few key things I'm looking for are honesty, trust, and an open mind. I think I could work around a lot of specifics if those three things are golden. ghoklebutter
Good point. And another problem with these lists is that they can be very limiting in nature. There are a few essential things I desire in partners, but when I expand them all the way, it's pretty much impossible for me to be open to people who aren't exactly what I wish for.

 

Exactly. Like you said, those essentials are the things I'm going to be looking for. If go further and try to fulfill all my "wishes" for a person, I imagine I'll be spending a lot of time alone, and missing out on fun, worthwhile and potentially amazing relationships. 

Which reminds me of a clip from a favorite movie of mine. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#36 Posted by ghoklebutter (19327 posts) -

 [QUOTE="ghoklebutter"][QUOTE="LZ71"]Am I the only one who always has trouble with these kinds of lists? When I make general lists, they're just kind of boring. "Smart, funny, good listener..." Stuff I'd imagine most people are looking for. And I don't like specific lists where I try and name every single attribute of the person I want to be in a relationship with, because honestly I have no idea yet specifically what kind of person I would truly be happy with. I say today I want someone who's adventurous and loves to travel, but I don't know what I'll be like in the future. Maybe that's because I don't have a wealth of experience yet though. But regardless, I'll make a go of it. I think the few key things I'm looking for are honesty, trust, and an open mind. I think I could work around a lot of specifics if those three things are golden. LZ71

Good point. And another problem with these lists is that they can be very limiting in nature. There are a few essential things I desire in partners, but when I expand them all the way, it's pretty much impossible for me to be open to people who aren't exactly what I wish for.

 

Exactly. Like you said, those essentials are the things I'm going to be looking for. If go further and try to fulfill all my "wishes" for a person, I imagine I'll be spending a lot of time alone, and missing out on fun, worthwhile and potentially amazing relationships. 

Which reminds me of a clip from a favorite movie of mine. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Robin is better than the girl of my dreams; she's real." Awesome quote. I should keep that in mind.
#37 Posted by WiiCubeM1 (4728 posts) -

Intelligence, good sense of humor, tolerant, and doesn't expect me to pick up the check every damn time I go out to eat with her. F*ck traditional courtesy, we both have jobs for a reason.

#38 Posted by Rockman999 (7232 posts) -

A companion.

Someone I can hangout and fvck.

She doesn't have to like everything I like and neither do I have to like everything she likes.

#39 Posted by whiskeystrike (12068 posts) -

A companion.

Someone I can hangout and fvck.

She doesn't have to like everything I like and neither do I have to like everything she likes.

Rockman999
hey babby how's it going
#40 Posted by Obviously_Right (5103 posts) -

I don't date anybody who cries. That is the first sign that, that person is pathetic and weak.raymanproguy

 Tears are just gods piss raining down your face. In other words, when you cry God is pissing on your face because he is disgusted in how weak you are. John 22.3.5.1Chuubby

lol

#41 Posted by Rockman999 (7232 posts) -

[QUOTE="Rockman999"]

A companion.

Someone I can hangout and fvck.

She doesn't have to like everything I like and neither do I have to like everything she likes.

whiskeystrike

hey babby how's it going

Nope.

I'm still not talking to you after what happened last night.

When I woke up this morning there was glitter and whipped cream EVERYWHERE!

:|

#42 Posted by IdioticIcarus (2242 posts) -
Honestly I just want someone I like, who likes me back. The rest is just kind of a plus.
#43 Posted by -Renegade (8340 posts) -

I prefer a good looking girl with needs. One whose affection can be bought and her desire to be with me depending solely upon the size of my checkbook.

Master_ShakeXXX
Sounds like you are looking for a hooker not a partner. :lol:
#44 Posted by whiskeystrike (12068 posts) -

[QUOTE="whiskeystrike"][QUOTE="Rockman999"]

A companion.

Someone I can hangout and fvck.

She doesn't have to like everything I like and neither do I have to like everything she likes.

Rockman999

hey babby how's it going

Nope.

I'm still not talking to you after what happened last night.

When I woke up this morning there was glitter and whipped cream EVERYWHERE!

:|

just marking my territory
#45 Posted by tocool340 (20580 posts) -
Respectful Trustful Compromise (But only needing to do it on rare occasions) Open-minded emotionally stable and not overly sensitive Strong-willed Logical thinker Has common sense Mutual hobbies and interests Creative Sense of humor Don't have too high of expectations for everything Not high maintenance but takes care of herself in terms of fitness and hygiene .....I think I covered most of it....
#46 Posted by SaudiFury (8707 posts) -

just off the bat, gaming is a plus but it is most certainly not a must. what is a must is she gotta be ok with it, cause I'm not not dropping my one major passion-hobby just for a woman. and i wouldn't do or expect that out of her of her major passionate hobby either - whatever it may be. 

 

As for what i look for in personality? I look for someone who is truly-open minded and flexible and yet strongly values traditional family values and roles. I look for a wife who wants to be a mom, not a career-woman who drops her kids off in daycares, or in Saudi's case, where the maid takes over the role of mom.  Someone who comes from very tight family bonds as well. It's why i've said before many times, that the people i bond with the best (in general for the most part) are the Saudi-halfy/East-West families. Families that don't treat the social bonds as "your 18 and your out" set up....

 

I got no qualms whatsoever with career-women, one who has the passion and drive to go where she wants. but it's not what I'M looking for. I've made very strong bonds with a few women i had the pleasure of getting to know in college that i hope to not let go so easily while at the same time given their passions or personalities i've mostly not thought of them as long-term romantic material.

and that isn't to say that i want to be an absent-father always being the workaholic. I have very very few memories of my dad as a young boy.  my dad was always working, he spoiled me and my siblings but never really played with us or bonded, and at least half of my childhood memories are him playing the disciplinary role. 

 

but see, right now, that's a big thing i'm looking for, someone to settle down with. Not mess around with, not a gaming buddy that i also happen to be sexually attracted to - though that'd be a huge plus. 

 

EDIT:

someone who is thick skinned, you have no idea how attractive it is to me when i can say - lets say - a dirty sex joke, and the girl genuinely laughs and can toss it back. I dunno, i guess it shows me how emotionally stable and mature you are in handling that subject material. I love it when women can dish out jokes and jibes as well as take them. 

 

#47 Posted by Kats_RK (2080 posts) -

Honestly I just want someone I like, who likes me back. The rest is just kind of a plus.IdioticIcarus

Aww same here.

#48 Posted by tenaka2 (17040 posts) -

Good bj skills, everything else is extraneous.

#49 Posted by Young_Charter (19889 posts) -
[QUOTE="tocool340"]Respectful Trustful Compromise (But only needing to do it on rare occasions) Open-minded emotionally stable and not overly sensitive Strong-willed Logical thinker Has common sense Mutual hobbies and interests Creative Sense of humor Don't have too high of expectations for everything Not high maintenance but takes care of herself in terms of fitness and hygiene .....I think I covered most of it....

That sounds pretty good. You thought about that well.
#50 Posted by jesuschristmonk (3308 posts) -

A serious one, where I have, maybe, something in common with her, and who actually cares about me as much as I would her.