My best friend of thirteen years just kissed me...

This topic is locked from further discussion.

#1 Posted by RTFlakfizer (489 posts) -

A little backstory, first. I've known Ethan since were were in the sixth grade. We bonded instantly, and we did everything together. We cheated off each other. We rode bikes together. We took the rap for each other. When we entered high school, we got jobs at the same Wendy's together. We even picked up chics together. After we graduated, the only think we didn't do together was go to the same college. Well, both of our classes are done, and he decided to fly over here to hang out with me all this month.

It's been a blast hanging out with Ethan again. We went right back into trouble. We even thought it would be fun to pick up chics again, so we headed to out to a local nightclub last night, had a few drinks and flirted with a few girls. We made it a contest to see who would get one first. Naturally, he won, but I came in at a close second. :P The four of us decided to head back to my apartment and watch a movie or two. So as we were watching the movie, I was making out with my girl on the couch while Ethan and his girl were just holding each other on the rocker. It got late, so we let the girls go home, and then Ethan and I pretty much stayed up all night playing games.

So today while we were goofiing off, I wanted to start some conversation with him, so I asked what he thought of his girl. I thought it was odd that he didn't even so much as kiss her, so I brought that up. Then he said he wasn't attracted to her... and I said "WTF, man! She was hot! What did you not like?" And then he dropped the bombshell on me. "That she was a girl. John... I'm gay."

My jaw just droppedon the ground. The Ethan I knew was nothing short of a lady's man, a pimp if you will. So he sat me down on the couch, and he started explaining to me how he was never comfortable with women, how he was always forcing himself to date them and have sex with them, and try to like it. But he just said deep down, it wasn't working for me. Then he dropped the biggest bombshell that has ever been dropped on me. "John, I love you. I've always loved you. I just never told you before because I was too afraid it would ruin our friendship." I asked him why he waited so long to tell me, and why even tell me at all, and he said, "Because I'm tired of hiding it from you, and I'd rather get it out and risk losing you as a friend than never getting it out and not knowing what would happen."

So I was just sitting there... speechless, probably in shock, and he grabbed my hand, and we just sorta stared into each other's eyes... and he leant in close, and seeing me not repel, he leaned in all the way and kissed me on the lips. And.. I think for a split second.. I kissed him back, before I snapped to my senses and stood up and then.. I socked him in jaw. I keep playing this over and over in my mind trying to figure out if it was real, what I did. I just punched my best friend who told me his deepest secret... :(

So we got in this big fight (verbal, not physical), and I kicked him out of my apartment... Heleft without his cellphone, and I have no idea where is now to apologize. I hurt him so bad, but I mean... it was just a reaction, you know? But what I'm really concerned about is that split second where I think I kissed him back. What does this mean? Could I be gay Do I...love Ethan more than just as a friend? Oh God... what do I do? :(

#2 Posted by Lemon-Demon35 (5792 posts) -
*backs away slowly*
#3 Posted by Greatgone12 (25469 posts) -
Come out in an astonishing fashion to support, get married to the male love of your life, only to have your friend Ethan claim it was all a joke
#5 Posted by mlbslugger86 (12867 posts) -

oh yeah....i think that your most likely feel the same way.

i could be wrong, maybe it was a joke maybe?

#6 Posted by Sajo7 (14049 posts) -

*backs away slowly*Lemon-Demon35

*backs away slowly-er*

#7 Posted by Travo_basic (38751 posts) -
Somebody's gonna say it, soI will: Blog it!
#9 Posted by SpiritEmu (3370 posts) -

A little backstory, first. I've known Ethan since were were in the sixth grade. We bonded instantly, and we did everything together. We cheated off each other. We rode bikes together. We took the rap for each other. When we entered high school, we got jobs at the same Wendy's together. We even picked up chics together. After we graduated, the only think we didn't do together was go to the same college. Well, both of our classes are done, and he decided to fly over here to hang out with me all this month.

It's been a blast hanging out with Ethan again. We went right back into trouble. We even thought it would be fun to pick up chics again, so we headed to out to a local nightclub last night, had a few drinks and flirted with a few girls. We made it a contest to see who would get one first. Naturally, he won, but I came in at a close second. :P The four of us decided to head back to my apartment and watch a movie or two. So as we were watching the movie, I was making out with my girl on the couch while Ethan and his girl were just holding each other on the rocker. It got late, so we let the girls go home, and then Ethan and I pretty much stayed up all night playing games.

So today while we were goofiing off, I wanted to start some conversation with him, so I asked what he thought of his girl. I thought it was odd that he didn't even so much as kiss her, so I brought that up. Then he said he wasn't attracted to her... and I said "WTF, man! She was hot! What did you not like?" And then he dropped the bombshell on me. "That she was a girl. John... I'm gay."

My jaw just droppedon the ground. The Ethan I knew was nothing short of a lady's man, a pimp if you will. So he sat me down on the couch, and he started explaining to me how he was never comfortable with women, how he was always forcing himself to date them and have sex with them, and try to like it. But he just said deep down, it wasn't working for me. Then he dropped the biggest bombshell that has ever been dropped on me. "John, I love you. I've always loved you. I just never told you before because I was too afraid it would ruin our friendship." I asked him why he waited so long to tell me, and why even tell me at all, and he said, "Because I'm tired of hiding it from you, and I'd rather get it out and risk losing you as a friend than never getting it out and not knowing what would happen."

So I was just sitting there... speechless, probably in shock, and he grabbed my hand, and we just sorta stared into each other's eyes... and he leant in close, and seeing me not repel, he leaned in all the way and kissed me on the lips. And.. I think for a split second.. I kissed him back, before I snapped to my senses and stood up and then.. I socked him in jaw. I keep playing this over and over in my mind trying to figure out if it was real, what I did. I just punched my best friend who told me his deepest secret... :(

So we got in this big fight (verbal, not physical), and I kicked him out of my apartment... Heleft without his cellphone, and I have no idea where is now to apologize. I hurt him so bad, but I mean... it was just a reaction, you know? But what I'm really concerned about is that split second where I think I kissed him back. What does this mean? Could I be gay Do I...love Ethan more than just as a friend? Oh God... what do I do? :(

RTFlakfizer

Uh... Are you attracted to women?

#10 Posted by TERMINAT0R1 (3267 posts) -

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

Indeed.

#11 Posted by Berzz (14360 posts) -
Gee, interesting story.
#12 Posted by Lemon-Demon35 (5792 posts) -
[QUOTE="Sajo7"]

[QUOTE="Lemon-Demon35"]*backs away slowly*mig_killer2

*backs away slowly-er*

*proceeds to back away slowly than says "f*** it!!" and then runs away*

Stop trying to fit in :P
#13 Posted by tequilasunriser (6378 posts) -

[QUOTE="Lemon-Demon35"]*backs away slowly*Sajo7

*backs away slowly-er*

Thats too slow. You just want to stay don't you?

#14 Posted by SpiritEmu (3370 posts) -

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

Gay, friend, kiss.

#15 Posted by Blood-Scribe (6465 posts) -

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

Oh come on, it's just six paragraphs that would take the average reader one minute to read, at the most. Anyway, long story short, he found out his best friend was gay and then he confessed his love for him, and he tried to kiss him, it ended up with a fight, and now he feels bad for hurting him.

Now, as for what to do. Go to his place, return his cellphone, and ask for forgiveness. There's no reason to throw away such a long friendship, and you should do your best to tell him you're sorry, and that you accept him for who he is, and that you still want to be good friends with him.

Don't worry about your sexuality either, there's no reason to be afraid of who you are, and there's no reason to dwell on it. Just do what you feel is right, and do your best to keep him as a friend.

#16 Posted by thardus317 (6400 posts) -

Apologies but that sounds like a scene from a soap opera. O_o

#17 Posted by Beaman (7305 posts) -
haha you're gay.
but seriously... just tell him you're flattered but you dont dig boys and carry on with the friendship, unless you like boys too, then date him.
#18 Posted by RTFlakfizer (489 posts) -

Somebody's gonna say it, soI will: Blog it!Travo_basic

Ok... why bother with a pointless comment like that? And what good does me blogging this do? Who the hell is going to read my blog? In case you haven't noticed, I'm a noob. I don't even have any friends on GS yet. I come posting something that's very personal, looking for insight from people, and I get comments like this? Very disrespectful...

#19 Posted by Beaman (7305 posts) -
[QUOTE="mig_killer2"]

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

SpiritEmu

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

Gay, friend, kiss.


3=/=1
#20 Posted by mayormoose (836 posts) -
In my opinion you are not gay because of how you described yourself.
#21 Posted by Kikouken (15913 posts) -
**i leave topic because im short of words
#22 Posted by OfficialJab (3249 posts) -
Well I don't think you should have punched him, as a reaction thats pretty harsh but... wow what a huge thing to find out. I think it'll get worked out if you guys talk again, but damn he must feel like ass.
#23 Posted by Sajo7 (14049 posts) -

Thats too slow. You just want to stay don't you?tequilasunriser

I only need a little more dialouge more my new Oscar winning movie. >__>

#24 Posted by MattUD1 (20715 posts) -

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

His male friend is gay and the TC is unsure of what to do.

I only got the the part where your male friend tried to like heterosexual sex but failed miserably. So...

Just tell your friend that you don't have feelings (or do, but from the "She was HOT!" part you don't) for him the way he has feeling for you. If he was really your friend he would fully understand. But he has feelings for you... which makes it very complicated.

#25 Posted by Joshywaa (10995 posts) -

well since everyone else who posted all seem to have ADD and can't read anything that's long......

You definetley need to apologize/talk to him. What you did was unforgiveable after he told you what he must have been hiding for years, and it was probably the first time he's ever told anyone, i'am not sure if he'll ever accept himself if the first thing someone did to him was punch him in the face after he revealed it....................I'am not trying to be a jerk, as i'am sure i would have done the same....but seriously, you really should get in contact with him quick and try to sort things out.

#26 Posted by jango7192 (2349 posts) -
ummm... ... ... ... :o ... maybe you shouldn't have punched the one who luvs u... ... *runs away*
#27 Posted by Travo_basic (38751 posts) -

[QUOTE="Travo_basic"]Somebody's gonna say it, soI will: Blog it!RTFlakfizer

Ok... why bother with a pointless comment like that? And what good does me blogging this do? Who the hell is going to read my blog? In case you haven't noticed, I'm a noob. I don't even have any friends on GS yet. I come posting something that's very personal, looking for insight from people, and I get comments like this? Very disrespectful...

What do you expect? It's the Gamespot OT.

#28 Posted by tequilasunriser (6378 posts) -

[QUOTE="Travo_basic"]Somebody's gonna say it, soI will: Blog it!RTFlakfizer

Ok... why bother with a pointless comment like that? And what good does me blogging this do? Who the hell is going to read my blog? In case you haven't noticed, I'm a noob. I don't even have any friends on GS yet. I come posting something that's very personal, looking for insight from people, and I get comments like this? Very disrespectful...

You said it yourself, you are on Gamespot, you should expect less from us. :P

#29 Posted by Greatgone12 (25469 posts) -

[QUOTE="Travo_basic"]Somebody's gonna say it, soI will: Blog it!RTFlakfizer

Ok... why bother with a pointless comment like that? And what good does me blogging this do? Who the hell is going to read my blog? In case you haven't noticed, I'm a noob. I don't even have any friends on GS yet. I come posting something that's very personal, looking for insight from people, and I get comments like this? Very disrespectful...

Have you ever been the internet, honestly?

The internet is people!

#30 Posted by mig_killer2 (4906 posts) -

hmmmmkay. I actually read it this time. well, very interesting story. well, I dont think you kissed him back. you probably would have pushed back if you weren't in this state of shock.

are you attracted to women?

#31 Posted by SpiritEmu (3370 posts) -
[QUOTE="SpiritEmu"][QUOTE="mig_killer2"]

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

Beaman

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

Gay, friend, kiss.


3=/=1

gayfriendkiss.

#32 Posted by greenprince (3332 posts) -
*backs away slowly*Lemon-Demon35
Follows him but trips on the way
#33 Posted by Travo_basic (38751 posts) -
[QUOTE="RTFlakfizer"]

[QUOTE="Travo_basic"]Somebody's gonna say it, soI will: Blog it!tequilasunriser

Ok... why bother with a pointless comment like that? And what good does me blogging this do? Who the hell is going to read my blog? In case you haven't noticed, I'm a noob. I don't even have any friends on GS yet. I come posting something that's very personal, looking for insight from people, and I get comments like this? Very disrespectful...

You said it yourself, you are on Gamespot, you should expect less from us. :P

Exactly!:P

#34 Posted by mig_killer2 (4906 posts) -
[QUOTE="mig_killer2"]

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

MattUD1
His male friend is gay and the TC is unsure of what to do.

that was 18 times as many words as I asked for! you fail
#35 Posted by EvanSkanes (10942 posts) -

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

Manlove.

#36 Posted by Guiltfeeder566 (10068 posts) -

I am loss for words. Thats a lolful story.

#37 Posted by RTFlakfizer (489 posts) -

Uh... Are you attracted to women?SpiritEmu

Yes. Always have been. And I was never attracted to guys. I mean, we used to act gay and pretend we were lovers in public, like at the amusement park, just to get a rise out people, but I thought we both were just acting, and now I know he was able to act like he always wanted to, feeling safe because he thought I knew he was acting, too. And I've never EVER thought of him this way, until he kissed me. Is it normal to be completely confused over your sexuality because your best friend kissed you?

#38 Posted by smallcaplegend (3083 posts) -

well since everyone else who posted all seem to have ADD and can't read anything that's long......

You definetley need to apologize/talk to him. What you did was unforgiveable after he told you what he must have been hiding for years, and it was probably the first time he's ever told anyone, i'am not sure if he'll ever accept himself if the first thing someone did to him was punch him in the face after he revealed it....................I'am not trying to be a jerk, as i'am sure i would have done the same....but seriously, you really should get in contact with him quick and try to sort things out.

Joshywaa

HEY TC, there is your answer ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ it's well thought out

#39 Posted by ArmoredAshes (4025 posts) -
Well if you wanna keep him as a friend apologize and explain that you were jsut shocked and shouldnt have hit him. If he still wants to be a friend he'll forgive you. This is all assuming you still want to be his friend.
#40 Posted by SolracSelbor (1144 posts) -
That was a pretty immature move. Gay people really have it hard, i mean they live their entire youth hiding who they are, and you are a perfect example for why they do. I think you should apologize. Tell him you dont like other boys and that he needs to accept it, but that you still can be friends (if he wants to be). Remember, people are born gay its like punching a little person because he's little.
#41 Posted by MattUD1 (20715 posts) -
[QUOTE="MattUD1"][QUOTE="mig_killer2"]

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

His male friend is gay and the TC is unsure of what to do.

that was 18 times as many words as I asked for! you fail

I'm gonna give you a link in a spoiler tag, quote the post and without spoiler tags post it so i can click on it.

[spoiler] http://www.youfail.org [/spoiler]

#42 Posted by mig_killer2 (4906 posts) -

[QUOTE="SpiritEmu"]Uh... Are you attracted to women?RTFlakfizer

Yes. Always have been. And I was never attracted to guys. I mean, we used to act gay and pretend we were lovers in public, like at the amusement park, just to get a rise out people, but I thought we both were just acting, and now I know he was able to act like he always wanted to, feeling safe because he thought I knew he was acting, too. And I've never EVER thought of him this way, until he kissed me. Is it normal to be completely confused over your sexuality because your best friend kissed you?

well then your not gay tell your friend you're sorry, and tell him never to do that again
#43 Posted by AlexRA (2004 posts) -
Man I feel bad for you, what you should do is find him and tell him your sorry about punching him but your not gay but you still want to be friends, unless you are gay but if you like women then your not just try to find him.
#44 Posted by MidnightSasha (881 posts) -
OMG! what a thumping good read, it sounds like the many storys in animes I watch, but if what you say is true dude, don't force yourself to be gay or anything but since you kissed him back, maby it was ment to be all along, :oops: a story like that gets me all happy and emotional even if you are lieing which alot of people do online, if it is true you deffinatly can't lose him, as a friend or *lover* you need to find him an apologive, though thats easier said then done.
#45 Posted by Liquid-Prince (2277 posts) -

In my opinion you are not gay because of how you described yourself.mayormoose

I have a strong belief that there is no such thing as being gay unless your brain is addled or you have been born transexual meaning you have a bit of both genders. Other then those two reasons, there is no such thing as being gay cause naturally humans were created to attract opposites. And for that split second that you kissed him was probably all in your head. if your into women which I think you are, then no you're not gay

#46 Posted by mig_killer2 (4906 posts) -
[QUOTE="mig_killer2"][QUOTE="MattUD1"][QUOTE="mig_killer2"]

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

MattUD1

His male friend is gay and the TC is unsure of what to do.

that was 18 times as many words as I asked for! you fail

I'm gonna give you a link in a spoiler tag, quote the post and without spoiler tags post it so i can click on it.

[/spoiler] http://www.youfail.org [/spoiler]

that was hilarious!!!:lol:
#47 Posted by Blood-Scribe (6465 posts) -

[QUOTE="SpiritEmu"]Uh... Are you attracted to women?RTFlakfizer

Yes. Always have been. And I was never attracted to guys. I mean, we used to act gay and pretend we were lovers in public, like at the amusement park, just to get a rise out people, but I thought we both were just acting, and now I know he was able to act like he always wanted to, feeling safe because he thought I knew he was acting, too. And I've never EVER thought of him this way, until he kissed me. Is it normal to be completely confused over your sexuality because your best friend kissed you?

That happened to me in the 8th grade, and after awhile, I just didn't care about my sexuality anymore. Just don't dwell on it and you'll be fine. You might be a little shocked for a couple weeks or so, but you'll get over it. Stuff like this tends to make you care less about your sexuality.

#48 Posted by raiza54003 (8 posts) -
Dude, if you go out with him, make sure you get some KY, otherwise it's gonna burn in the back if you know what I mean.(SICK FREAK!!! J/K)
#49 Posted by ArmoredAshes (4025 posts) -
[QUOTE="MattUD1"][QUOTE="mig_killer2"]

wall of text:(

summarize it in 1 word!

mig_killer2

His male friend is gay and the TC is unsure of what to do.

that was 18 times as many words as I asked for! you fail

actually it was 14 words :P

#50 Posted by SpiritEmu (3370 posts) -

[QUOTE="SpiritEmu"]Uh... Are you attracted to women?RTFlakfizer

Yes. Always have been. And I was never attracted to guys. I mean, we used to act gay and pretend we were lovers in public, like at the amusement park, just to get a rise out people, but I thought we both were just acting, and now I know he was able to act like he always wanted to, feeling safe because he thought I knew he was acting, too. And I've never EVER thought of him this way, until he kissed me. Is it normal to be completely confused over your sexuality because your best friend kissed you?

You're not gay I guess it's normal. :\ But do what feels right?