How to be good and survive from bad people

Topic

move to Somalia

That is a horrible idea. Somalia has rampant rape

Light yourself on fire in a densely populated area like those monks in Vietnam.

That'll tell em what for!

Offing yourself will save you form everything, even the good people.

Be a basement dweller.

Get a shotgun.

Lock yourself in basement and grow a neckbeard while you are at it

Something I read on 4chan.

Buy a clawhammer.

Now, everywhere you go, bring your clawhammer. And don't just bring it with you - carry it in your hand, in the open. Grip the ever-loving shit out of it - I'm talking white-knuckle kung-fu death grip over here. Give it a good swing or two every once in a while, for good measure. And don't forget to have a perpetually pissed off look on your face, like if your balls got caught in your zipper, and that made you super angry.

Now no one will ever mess with your, guaranteed (by some guy on /b/).