Girlfriend help thread, need advise please.

Something happened last night with my girlfriend and I. I'll make it short. So she came over last night and we were taking pictures on my bed. She asked to see the camera roll of my iphone. In my camera roll there was a picture of my ex and I on the bed, this picture was taken a year ago and I don't even talk to my ex anymore. She got very upset, got all her stuff, and stormed out my house at 12 midnight in the rain. I tried to call her back to either call a cab for her or drive her home. She said we're through and to never contact her again. I sent her a few text messages this morning trying to apologize and explain the situation but she never responded. I been very sad today... the whole day. What happened was I really did forget about my ex and forgot to delete the photos. Anyone have any suggestions/advice how I should get her back? I really like her a lot.

You should explain the situation just like you explained it to us. Don't just try to call her, go find her and demand to be heard. If she still won't talk to you, get a mutual friend to talk to her.

I will give you her side of the story too. Her side of the story is that the picture on my phone taken a year ago with my ex was in the same position (laying down). She claims I still have feelings for my ex, which isn't true. I don't have any mutual friends with her. I guess I can try to go and ring her doorbell but she'd probably either not answer or curse me out.

If she is completely unwilling to even talk to you or hear you out after "only" seeing a picture of you and your ex on your bed, then I think it's best to move on. Even if you like her a lot, if she blows something like that out of proportion and refuses to talk to you whatsoever, it's not gonna be worth it.

Well that's one way to go but every relationship has explosions at some point....so your advice is better stay alone I guess. Anyway on topic....you can try to talk to her again....in person...not text. And then let it go. It either happens....or it doesn't. But some people are insecure about exes. Did you delete the picture yet? Because that is telling in and of itself.

Maybe I worded it incorrectly, but I was basically saying what you're advocating as well. Try to talk to her in person again, and explain the situation. But if he tries that and she still refuses to listen to him or try and understand the situation I don't really see how that kind of relationship would last in the future.

I understand why she could get upset but a reasonable person would at least hear you out. If she won't even open the door, then wait until she leaves her home. I trust you know her everyday schedule and where you can find her. And if ultimately, she's still unwilling to listen then @LZ71 is right, she's not worth it(of course you can't see it that way). In the end, she might even calm down on her own after a few days and seek you out or be open to discussion. Either way, good luck.

Fully clothed hopefully.

yup in the text messages I sent her this morning I told her the pictures of my ex are long gone and she can inspect my phone and do whatever she wants with it. I can't believe this is such a god damn big deal and she's willing to end our relationship cause of it. We slept together already, I was her first, and I honestly like her (almost love her) more than anything. I know her schedule, she gets home from work 8pm on Sundays and she also has a roommate who I met before. How should I do this? Should I go with flowers and ring her doorbell?

Why did you apologize?

Sorry she had to see the picture of my ex and I

@LegitGamer3212: Like I said, go to her house and if she won't see you, then you can wait for her after work. Give your side of the story and then it's up to her. Either she sees reason and you guys get back together or you can just move on with your life even if that sounds hard right now.

@LegitGamer3212: Just go talk with her.

Pretty much this. If you can't even have a reasonable conversation with her about this, she may be more trouble than she is worth. Yes, you probably should have deleted the photo's, but it is completely reasonable that you would forget to delete them or even want to hold onto them (not everyone wants to burn everything to do with their ex's). It would be reasonable for her to be somewhat upset by this situation, but to run out of your place at midnight, refuse to talk, and generally overreact is kind of ridiculous. I mean shit, she has to have known you and your ex were in bed together at some point, and she probably knows you don't talk to your ex anymore, so what is the big deal? TLDR, your gal is being a drama queen, maybe you should reconsider if this relationship is working.

That's not creepy at all

It depends. If he is sitting by her porch, sunlight striking his distraught face, his heart aching; it can be romantic.

And then there is the other way.

lol it might came out creepy

All I meant is that he needs to fight for this relationship(he even said that he loves her) so if she won't even answer the door to let him explain then he should attempt to talk to her someplace else.

For the time being, the best thing you can do is to give her some space. That's for everyone's sake not just for her because on the one hand you don't want to be smothering her with your persistence and on the other you shouldn't put yourself in the position of being clingy and unwelcomed. If what you share with her is anything remotely meaningful and substantive then she'll come to her senses you need not to worry. So the gist of it don't give up on the relationship easily; do fight by all means but also don't be dickless.

So, these said photos, post'em.

Reminds me of the time my ex girlfriend found old texts from an old girlfriend on my phone. We had a little fight but like you, they were from a year ago. Girls make a big deal about that sort of thing but I explained that they were old and I just forgot to delete them. She got over it. So the best thing to do, like they say, is simply explain yourself and if she's anything of a decent woman she'll forgive you.

I would probably just give her some time to deal with her emotions; not everybody is ready to talk about what's hurting them or making them angry right away because sometimes they aren't even fully sure what they're feeling. So maybe send her a message saying something like "I understand you're upset and you need your space right now and I will give it to you but please know that whenever you want to talk I'm here" and then give her a week or two for her to decide what she wants.

Cornering her by showing up and making demands will probably just break the rest of your relationship. If after a few weeks she stills wants to break it up because of a photo then there was probably nothing strong going between the two of you and you grovelling after her won't change that. On the other hand, if she does agree to talk, do more listening than talking...try to understand why she's feeling the way she is; maybe she panicked, maybe she has had a similar situation with an ex (just because you were the first she slept with doesn't necessarily mean you were the first guy she dated) that went sour...listen, put yourself in her situation, understand what she's going through and only then talk. That's my advice, anyway =)

Try a boyfriend, jeez girls are irrational.

@TheFlush: Lol what I tell kids these days too to mess with them.

My ex found porn on my phone and stormed out she got over it but little things add up and TC relation destin to fail but it's all good you kno

What's with all of you guys' girlfriends storming off for no reason? Are you all 15? =P If my wife found porn on my phone she'd probably tell me I'd be able to see it better on my pc =P

Thanks, you're right. I'll do this.

You're welcome. Best of luck!

She sounds crayzee. I think you'll solve this no problem relax

@korvus: My ex sounds a lot like TC girlfriend but she was 20. Your a lucky man korvus.

@playmynutz: You get more relaxed about certain unimportant things with age. I'm turning 30 next month and my wife is a couple years older than me. There's a lot of stuff we were adamant about 10 years ago and now we don't really see as a problem. You can't have a successful relationship if you stress every little detail =)

@LegitGamer3212:

Uh....that might break you two up for good.

Move on. If she's going to be all irrational and storm out over an old picture, she isn't much of a keeper.

i don't understand why all of you act like those photos don't matter and the girl shouldn't have gotten upset over them. i think what she thinks right now is pretty much the only logical explanation for having photos of your ex(in bed) on your phone. not that i don't believe TC regarding his lack of emotions towards his ex but try to put yourself in her shoes. what would you think?
IMO, the best thing you can do is to make her realize you understand her feelings and that you think she's right to be upset. don't make it look like she's angry and sad over some insignificant trivia. KEEP blaming yourself for it in front of her. heck even shed some tears if you can.

In fairness I doubt you would have willingly handed her the phone to look through your photo's if you had something to hide, unless your a real moron. I would visit her, apologise and simply explain that you showed her your phone because you had nothing to hide but that you did forget to delete those photo's because you forgot about them.

You should apologise for upsetting her but not for your actions. As far as I can see you were pretty straight up and just got caught out in an awkward situation, you didnt intend to cause her any distress so just explain that.

If she will not give you a second chance after this then she really isnt long term material. Iv put my missus through situations far more upsetting than this and she always has the courtesy to at least hear me out before she kicks my arse.

You realize that you should have deleted that photo when you broke up with your ex right? She got upset because you kept it.

He doesn't have to delete them if he doesn't want to. Not everyone likes to get rid of every memory of their ex's just because they broke up. Just because you are dating a new girl doesn't mean the last girl suddenly doesn't exist anymore and any time you spent with her is null and void. For example, I still have pictures of me and my ex together and I have no intention of deleting them. We had good some good times together, why would I suddenly purge those memories? If TC's girl friend was mature enough, she would have realized that people have histories and past relationships, and should have discussed the pictures with him in a mature manner (ie, "they make me uncomfortable, I would appreciate it if you deleted them") not run away in the middle of the night.

I need to find a guy who will freak out like this, video it and stick it up on youtube.

@korvus: wise words. I'm too care free woman feel like I don't love them. Then I care too much and they think I'm obsessed ugh

@playmynutz: I wouldn't worry too much; I'm sure that you'll find a girl who is in the same stage of life as you and you two will just click =)

I remember when my girlfriend found a fairly intimate and personal Christmas card from my ex-wife in one of my moving boxes.......

She is maybe on her period.... My wife always tends to overreact to everything when she is.