Uh...I got nothin' on this one. "I am your father" said the Black Knight as he chopped off Ike's head. There you go.
User Rating: 4 | Fire Emblem: Souen no Kiseki GC
Fire Emblem has been known for princely cool characters that may be slightly homosexual. But, Ike takes the cake of cowardly main characters. You'll find yourself in the beginning of the game wondering where the main character is and when he'll come in. And then you realize, "NO! You mean this blue haired coward is the main character?! Really?! He doesn't look ANYTHING like Marth"! But then I realized, "there's no way this coward's the main character". The search began for the main character. I didn't find him until the end of the game. Geoffry (GOFFREY). Geoffry also looks way awesomer in the second one but he lost his sideways glory. The worst character in this game is Elincia hands down...or maybe Mist...or Ike...or even Boyd, there's so many worst characters...Rolf. ROLF! HE'S the worst character in this game. Everyone says "Rolf's the best archer" I don't care. He's too cowardly to play with and he sucks. And archers suck anyway. Why would I waste a level up on someone that I hate when I can save it all for Geoffry? And freakin' Ike. Stealing all of Geoffry's expierence. Geoffry shoulda fought that orange knight! Magicians were the worst thing ever in this one. I never used one other than my one white mage. Mist...was the worst mage in the game. She sucks at everything she tries. She can't even kill herself right, she's still in the cutscenes. People are sayin' "she's the best mage in the game cuz she can use a sword". Well, she sucks at swinging a sword anyways. Why would I WANT that? Why can't she just use magic that actually does sumthin'?! But, just as you've lost all hope in this game you'll see the most champion thing in the history of anything. He single-handedly made this game playable. Sure, he's 10 times cooler in the second one but, he still has an eyepatch and rides a dragon without any depth perception. Haar is the most awesome character in this game besides the REAL main character. The best thing in the game was calvary. Titania was the worst thing ever. She was good in the beginning but sucked worse than anything at the end. And Geoffry was the best hands down. Anyone that says anything different needs to be stabbed in the eye. Cuz then they will know championship. Especially if they get an eyepatch. So awesome! Anyway, my favorite character was Kieran. Always showin up that coward Oscar. Oscar was one of the worst characters ever too. He was a good fighter, terrible talker. He had ugly hair, he had ugly armor, an ugly face, and he squint. That squint always enraged me! As for the story...not much to talk about. There was a skip button. But, what I've read off of wikipedia was laughable. I read some of the diolgue just to see how cowardly Ike truly was. But, nothing could compare to his most cowardly feet "I fight for my friends"! He's known for that and some idiots think "what an awesome character"! I always hated Ike and I never will like him again...or...I'll never like him. But, back to the story, it was like every cliche you could possibly imagine thrown into one heeping pile of crap (almost as bad as Final Fantasy 12). Come to think of it, I'm not sure who's worse. Vaan or Ike. Well...Ike does look...somewhat cooler than Vaan. He's got a head band, cape, and a shirt. Not to mention blue hair. Gotta have blue hair. Vaan has nothing except for his own cowardice. It's pretty sad whenever someone cowars at the sight of Ike. As much as I hate to say it, I read up the other Lords out of Fire Emblem and Ike's apparently the strongest. I still hate him the most. And Marth would kill him in a match of awesomeness. I just don't wanna play Fire Emblem 1 cuz I'm scared of what Marth truly is. What if he turns out to be the most cowardly creation since Vaan? Anyway, the battle system was less than original but still fun. It was simple. You didn't have to use a coward. Ike wasn't even THAT big of a coward in battle. Unless of course he spoke then he gets put in the back of the party. Zihark was the best swordsman. I still like Mia but Zihark's better in the first one and he has an awesome name. But Mia's by far the best swordmaster in the second and one of the best characters in the second game. Lucia sucks. Always. She's so cool lookin that you're tempted to use her. But no, she sucks too bad. What's wrong with these people?! You'd think some of Geoffry's championship would rub off on her and she'd get a horse or sumthin'. I hate Bastion. Always will. French coward. I really don't think their original intention was for Ike not to end up with the princess girl. I'm pretty sure he was supposed to end up with her by the second one. And what Fire Emblem has ended SPOILER without the main character getting married to a GIRL? I miss Ephraim. But Geoffry CAN get married to the girl! I wonder why that is! MAIN CHARACTER! Again, they didn't let you play with him through most of the game otherwise you would realize "why am I playing with Ack when I could play with awesomeness and pure championship"?! As for the characters that I hate: Ike, Mist, Rolf, Shinon, Boyd, Stephan, Oscar, Gatrie, Astrid, Jill, Bastion, Sothe, Tormod, Makahli...Tormod's tiger guy, Mordicai (the Jew of the group), Titania, Toronio, Griel, uh...Callil's husband guy...whatever the heck his name was, Brom, Llyana, Makalov (ugh, Makalov, I hated him the most...or almost the most), Nanaki, Soren (cowardly cross-dressing Soren), Elinicia, Rolf (might as well mention him again), and uh...Kyle...whoever that shall be. I think there was a Kyle somewhere. Characters that I like: Mia, Haar, Marcia, Kieran, Geoffry, Lucia, Zihark (Zihark is a coward but he gets up here because of his line "to put it simply, I'm a double agent". That was so bad that it was awesome), Lethe, Nephenee, Sephiroth, Grawnon, Calill (I was enraged that Geoffry couldn't marry Calill. I liked her a lot better than cowardly Elincha), bird man, other raven...guy, not the old guy but the one that started with an 'n', wait...they both started with an 'n', I think. If I failed to mention your favorite character, assume that I hate them. Yeah, all in all, I feel pretty good about wasting forever of my life on this game. It's really long, it wants you to play it 60 times over so you can get an extra character on an one extra level after the game's over. It's not worth it unless you're an idiot or a hardcore geek/idiot. I am not one of those people. But...if I ever really NEEDED to have those people, I'll just plop in a gameshark. I'm not spending five thousand hours to get Gwanon. As for the names, clearly these guys were playing way too much Final Fantasy 7 and thought "hey look, Sephiroth, Nanaki, we could rip those names off and change like...two letters! Nay! One!". And then came Sanaki and Sephiran. I had to get the Sephiroth theme just so every time I see Sephiran I get to play it and imagine Buster Sword and Masamune goin' at it with no one holding them of course. Just like floating and cutting each other. And as I'm doing this, I'm probably tapping the start button as fast as humanly possible. I had to SEE Sephiran in this game. I had to look up where he came in so I didn't skip it. And then I laughed and laughed. You'd think with the name Sephiran, he'd be cool and be a swordsman. Not a cowardly magician with the power of extreme cowardice. Once again, I'm not trying to offend anyone I'm just extremely funny. If you don't get the joke, please just...walk away Donny.
