The Truth
Don Peyote
Although The Truth gives you this mission, it ties into the troubles with Wu Zi’s casino, as the end result will let you scope out Caligula’s Palace without causing too many eyebrows to raise.
Luckily, it isn’t a very difficult mission, although it does involve one of those annoying cross-country jaunts. After TT gives you the location of the band members, head out that way and locate them. You’ll need to ferry them around, which requires a four-door vehicle; if you don’t have one, drop down to the nearby highway and get a taxi or somesuch, then return to the Brits and grab them.
Your first stop, for some reason or another, is the snake farm near your airstrip, so run by there, kill all the yokels, then get the band into Las Venturas to finish off the mission. After you complete it, Kent Paul will call you up and start offering you missions on behalf of Ken Rosenthal.
Ken Rosenthal
Intensive Care
It appears as though the snitch you roughed up with the car earlier is now a likely target for a mob hit, so you’ll have to go and pick him up from the hospital and move him to a safe location. Unfortunately for you, it appears that some mob goons have already picked him up, so after you arrive, you’ll need to track them down and get them to exit the ambulance that they’re driving. (It’s a fitting Rockstar bit of humor that a mission given to you by a lawyer will see you chasing ambulances.)
To complicate matters further, though, you’ll have three ambulances to chase, only one of which, obviously, is the correct one. The other two are real ambulances, and you’ll need to ram them to check their reaction; if the driver jumps out and yells at you, then you’ve hit a real ambulance; if he drives off faster, then you’ve found your target. You’ll almost always hit a real ambulance first, though, and after the driver calls in his warning, the mob ambulance will start making its way to the freeway to escape out of town.
At this point, you’ll have two ambulances to chase after, only one of which is the real one. If you’re in a fast car, and you probably should be for this mission, just go for whichever one’s closer and tap it. If it’s another real one, then book it for the last ambulance. When you do find the mob ambulance, you’ll have to rough it up a bit by ramming it around on the road, so try to jack something hardy, like a Sentinal or an Admiral, before you start the destruction derby.
After a bit of roughhousing, though, the goons will jump out of the ambulance and start blasting you. They pack SMGs, so be cautious as you make your way to the ambulance. Even after you do gain control of it, though, your trip to your destination will be beset by more mobsters in sedans that’ll try to run you off the road. You can’t shake them, so drive like a madman until you get back to the factory.
The Meat Business
Not much to say here; this is a straight-up killing mission. Get loaded out with all the ammo and armor you can carry at the Ammu-Nation, then drive Ken over to the abattoir. After CJ delivers one of the best lines in the game, you’ll have to shoot your way through a couple dozen mobsters to escape. Don’t worry, the guys don’t have particularly great aim, so take them out from as far away as possible, then exit the building and drive Ken back to Caligula’s.
Freefall
Of all the crazy-ass stuff that you’ve been asked to do so far, making a free jump from one plane to another a mile above the ocean has got to be the craziest. Nonetheless, if you want to please your new mob master, you’ll have to fly out to meet the incoming plane (and it’s waaay out there, well beyond where the map ends), get behind it, and fly through the trailing corona. This’ll drop you onto the rival mob’s plane, where you can kill off the assassins before they land. (Use the L1 button to fire while you keep your right thumb on the analog stick, and bring along a full set of armor, as this can be a tough little shooting gallery.)
Saint Mark’s Bistro
Although you might be thinking Ultimate Easter Egg, your trip to Liberty City only consists of a one-building interior view. Bring along body armor and clear the place out! After you eliminate everyone on the upper level, you can chuck grenades down below to kill off everyone but Farelli. Said boss has dual-wield Uzis, and packs a lot of health, so you might want to take him out with a rocket launcher or minigun if you have either of those. Regardless, when he’s dead, make your way down to the bottom of the restaurant to get out of dodge. You’ll get your money and respect when you make a successful landing in Las Venturas. This will also enable you to get your heist on, assuming you did the rest of Wu Zi’s missions and got the keycard from your girl up north.
