Disgusting.

User Rating: 6.5 | Boogerman: A Pick and Flick Adventure SNES
This is a completely disgusting, degrading, vulgar, and crude game. Therefore, this will be a completely disgusting, degrading, vulgar, and crude review.

Boogerman is about a gross, slovenly supeerhero who never showers and probably stinks like dead people with rotting goo in every crevasse of his body. His design is actually great and it feels like you can smell the dried up sweat between his toes just by looking at him.

This superhero somehow gets sucked into an alternate dimension made up of even grosser things than him. Your job is to hunt down the biggest, grossest, most depraved degenerate of them all...Booger Meister Meister Booger.

You'll need to go through each disgusting, mucus filled, infection carrying level in order to catch up with him. You'll face nose goblins, and other creatures that are probably made of things like ear wax, feces, snot...and god knows what else.

So how do you fight through these mediocre levels? Well you have an arsenal at your disposal. You can jump on your enemies if you like. You can also take your finger....dig DEEEEEP inside your nose and scrape off a big, green, slimey, clingy booger from the wall of your nostril, and then flick it off of your finger into your enemy...thus killing him.

Or if you find something mucus producing to eat, you can snort with all your might, making a nice puddle of mucus in your throat, and then spit it out forcefully, throwing the saliva and mucus towards your enemy..thus killing him.

If that doesn't sound like fun, might I suggest breathing in real good, even build up some bile, and then let out a huge disgusting burp that smells like whatever contents of rotting food are left inside your stomach....this will be pointed directly at your enemy....thus killing him.

Of course if all those sound weak...go ahead and turn around, squat down as far as you can, point your anus at your enemy, pull your buttcheeks apart....and then perform the valsalva's maneuver to force a nice ball of gas from your feces filled lower intestines....shooting the "fart" in the direction of your enemy...thus killing him.

And no..I am not kidding. All of these wonderful techniques can be performed in Boogerman. So yeah, the game is gross. It's all about gross. And I love gross. But the game doesn't live up to gross.

It's pretty much a mediocre disappointment. The levels are boring. You collect floating things which is really unoriginal. It's short. There really is no story. It just feels like a letdown because you would think a game about boogers, farting, and burping would be more fun.

I do, however, have to give a big booger encrusted thumbs up to the character designs and animation. The characters are all charmingly disgusting. They look great. And the animation is breathtaking and is more fluid than the mucus running out of your nostrils, down the snot gutter of your upper lip, and into your filthy mouth.

Man this review is gross! I warned you!

So don't bother PICKING it up...(get it? No? Screw you.) It's pretty much a waste of time...you want to see boogers? I'm sure you know where you can get some...

I leave you now with a poem...

Everybody's doin' it, doin' it.
Pickin' their nose and chewin' it, chewin' it.

Thank you.